Despicable Me 2

Gru: [on the phone] No, no, no! What do you mean, she's not coming?! I have a backyard full of these little girls who are counting on a visit from a fairy princess! [a Minion accidentally hits his shin with a mace] Ah! Hurts! Ah! Stop it! [chases him off with his spatula; sighs before getting back on the phone] Listen! I don't want a refund! I want a fairy princess, please! Please, I am begging you. [pauses] You know what? I hope that you can sleep at night, you crusher of little girls' dreams! [hits the phone with his spatula and hangs up] Agnes: [approaches him] Ooh, ooh, when is the fairy princess coming? Gru: [in a happy singsong voice] Any minute now. Agnes: Yay! [runs off] Gru: [to the Minions; quietly] Stall them!

Despicable Me 2, CC BY-SA 4.0

Margo: Whoa! Whoa! Okay, okay, all right. That's enough of the magic show! Minions: Awwww. Margo: Wait, did you hear that? It sounded like the twinkling sounds of magical fairy dust. Agnes: [gasps] It's the fairy princess! She’s coming! Margo: [gasps] Look!

Despicable Me 2, CC BY-SA 4.0

Gru: [falsetto] It is I, Gru... Zinkerbell, the most magical fairy princess of all! And I am here to wish Princess Agnes a very happy birthday! [throws a handful of fairy dust] Little Girl: [raises her hand] How come you're so fat? Gru: Because… my house is made of candy, and sometimes, I eat instead of facing my problems! Little Girl: How come you have... [Gru blows some fairy dust in her face; coughs] Gru: [normally] Okay, time for cake! Agnes: Thank you, Gruzinkerbell. You’re the best fairy princess ever. Gru: [falsetto] You are welcome, little girl. Agnes: [runs off, but quickly returns; whispering] I know it’s really you, Gru. I’m just pretending for the other kids. Jillian: Hey there, Gru, Mr. Life of the Party! Gru: [attempts a smile; normally] Hello, Jillian. Jillian: So, I'm gonna go out on a limb here, but my friend Natalie is recently single, and... [Natalie falls down] Gru: No, no, no. Get off the limb right now. No limb. Jillian: Oh, come... she’s a riot. She sings karaoke

Despicable Me 2, CC BY-SA 4.0

Gru: Kyle? Kyle? Kyle, no! Do not do your business on the petunias! [picks Kyle and drops him in the yard next door] There you go, those are Fred's. Go crazy. [Kyle does his business, killing the plant and die; chuckles sinisterly] Good boy. Lucy: [off-screen] Mr. Gru? Gru: [stuttering] Wha, I didn't, wha... Yes? Lucy: [appears on-screen] Hi. Agent Lucy Wilde of the AVL. [shows her AVL ID-card, but notices she shows it upside-down] Oops. [giggles nervously, then becomes serious] Sorry. You're gonna have to come with me. Gru: Oh, sorry. I- [suddenly takes his freeze ray out of his polo, then aims and fires at Lucy] Freeze ray! Lucy: You know, you really should announce your weapons [takes a tube of lipstick out of her purse] after you fire them, Mr. Gru. For example, [presses a button on the tube, two barbs shoot into Gru, who drops his freeze ray when he is filled with electricity; in a happy singsong voice] Lipstick tazer! [Gru convulses, dances disco, and finally passes out due to th

Despicable Me 2, CC BY-SA 4.0

[screaming] <big>AAAAAAAIIIEEEAAAIIIEEEAAAAAHHHH!!!!!</big>

Despicable Me 2, CC BY-SA 4.0

Silas: Good afternoon, Mr. Gru. Gru: [weakly] Eh... Silas: I apologize for our methods of getting you there. Lucy: I don't! I'd do it again in a heartbeat! And I am not gonna lie, I enjoyed that. Every second of it. Gave me a bit of a buzz, actually... Silas: [interrupts Lucy] That's enough, Agent Wilde. Lucy: [calmly] Sorry, sir. Gru: Okay, this is bogus! [drops a starfish onto Stuart; Phil laughs at Stuart] I don't know who you people think you are, but... Silas: We are the Anti-Villain League. An ultra-secret organization dedicated to fighting crime on a global scale. Rob a bank, we're not interested. Kill someone, not our deal. But you want to melt the polar ice caps or vaporize Mount Fuji or even steal the moon? Then we notice. Gru: First of all, you got no proof that I did that. Second, after I did do that, I put it back! Silas: We're well aware of that, Mr. Gru. That's why we brought you here. I am the league's director, Silas Ramsbottom. Stuart: [smirks] Bottom. [starts laughin

Despicable Me 2, CC BY-SA 4.0