Men in Black

¿Qué dices si te rompo la cara?(What do you say if I break your face?) [the guy smiles and nods. He stops, and his own smile broadens, and he drops a hand on the guy's shoulder] No hablas ni una palabra del español, ¿ verdad, amigo? (You don't speak a word of Spanish, do you, friend?) [again, the guy smiles and nods. He looks back at Agent D] We got a winner. [to the others] Los restos estan libres a irse. Lárgense! (The rest of you are free to go. Scram!)

Men in Black (1997 film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Edgar: [from inside the house] I go out, I work my butt off to make a living, all I want is to come home to a nice clean house, with a nice fat steak on the table, but instead, I get this. It looks like poison. Don't you take that away! I'm eating that, dammit! It is poison, isn't it? I swear to God, I would not be surprised if it was, the way you skulk around here like a dog been hit too much, or ain't been hit enough. I can't make up my mind. You're useless, Beatrice. The only thing that pulls its weight around here is my goddamn truck! [an alien spaceship crashes into his truck. opens the door with a shotgun in his hand, he surveys the wreckage] Figures. [begins to walk over to the wreckage] Beatrice: [comes out to see the wreckage] What the heck is it, Edgar? Edgar: Get your big butt back in the house! Bug: [unseen] Place projectile weapon on the ground. Edgar: You can have my gun... [cocks it] ...when you pry it from my cold dead fingers. Bug: Your proposal is acceptable. Beatrice

Men in Black (1997 film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Inspector: Why do you suppose none of the other officers saw either of these two events? James: Well, sir, some of the other officers are a little soggy around the midsection. I guess that's why they weren't able to keep up. Sergeant: Hey, Edwards, if you were half the man I am - James: What the hell are you talkin' about? I am half the man that you are.

Men in Black (1997 film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Zed: Edwards, what the hell happened?! James: Hesitated. Zed: [brings forward a cardboard cutout of a little girl, shot between the eyes] May I ask why you felt little Tiffany deserved to die? James: Well, she was the only one that actually seemed dangerous at the time, sir. Zed: How'd you come to that conclusion? James: Well, first I was gonna pop this guy hangin' from the streetlight, and then I realized, you know, he's just workin' out. How would I feel if somebody come runnin' into the gym, bust me in my ass while I'm on the treadmill? Then I saw this, uh, snarling beast guy...and I noticed he had a tissue in his hand and I'm realizing, he's not snarling, he's sneezing. You know, ain't no real threat there. Then I saw little Tiffany. I'm thinkin', you know, eight-year-old white girl, middle of the ghetto, bunch of monsters this time of night, with quantum physics books? She 'bout to start some shit, Zed. She's about eight years old. Those books are way too advanced for her. If you

Men in Black (1997 film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Agent K: Where are you going? James: Yo. Hey, man, what the hell is all this? Agent K: Back in the mid-1950s, the government started a little underfunded agency with the simple and laughable purpose of establishing contact with a race not of this planet. Everybody thought the agency was a joke, except the aliens who made contact March 2, 1961, outside New York. There were nine of us the first night: seven agents, one astronomer, and one dumb kid who got lost on the wrong back road. James: [noticing a picture of K giving an alien flowers] Aww, you brought that tall man some flowers. Agent K: [points] This way. They were a group of intergalactic refugees. Wanted to use the Earth as an apolitical zone for creatures without a planet. Did you ever see the movie Casablanca? [James nods] Same thing, except no Nazis. James: Oh. Agent K: We agreed, and we concealed all the evidence of their landing. James: [looking at the picture] Uh-huh. So these are real flying saucers, and the World's Fair w

Men in Black (1997 film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Agent K: All right, kid, here's the deal. At any given time, there are around fifteen hundred aliens on the planet, most of them right here in Manhattan. And most of them are decent enough; they're just trying to make a living. James: Cab drivers. Agent K: No, not as many as you'd think. Humans, for the most part, don't have a clue. They don't want one or need one, either. They're happy. They think they have a good bead on things. James: But why? Why the big secret? People are smart. They can handle it. Agent K: A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky, dangerous animals, and you know it. Fifteen hundred years ago, everybody knew the Earth was the center of the universe. Five hundred years ago, everybody knew the Earth was flat. And fifteen minutes ago, you knew that people were alone on this planet. Imagine what you'll know tomorrow. James: What's the catch? Agent K: The catch? The catch is you will sever every human contact. Nobody will ever know you exist anywhere...Ever. I'll gi

Men in Black (1997 film), CC BY-SA 4.0