RV

Jamie: Who is that maniac? Cassie: [about the Gornickes] What do they like about us? We're not even that appealing! Carl: DAD!!! THE TOILET'S BACKED UP! Travis: Here's where you made your critical mistake: you listened to anything Howie and Joe Joe said. Nice boys, but they're a couple pliers short of a tool chest. Mary Jo: [about the Munros] Whoa. They are early risers. Earl: [about Bob] He-He was covered in turd. Moon: [about Carl] My hero. Billy: Mr. Munro, I was just telling Earl and Moon about that neat laptop you were usin'. Todd Mallory: Alright, no more details. Just email me the new proposal. [hangs up] Howie: Oh, dude, that is nasty.

RV (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Bob: [walks in] Welcome aboard, everybody. Before we embark, I think we should give this beauty a name. Suggestions? Cassie: The "Big Turd". Carl: The "Big Rolling Turd"? Bob: In that spirit, we set forth. [sits down]

RV (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Mary Jo: Do you want to hear about the time Jesus saved us from a tornado? Travis: Oh, it's a great story. Bob: You know, I'd love to, but I was in the little boys room taking care of business when Carl interrupted me, but Jamie'd love to hear it. [walks away] Mary Jo: Ah. Well, it seems just like yesterday.

RV (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Earl: So, do you have a boyfriend? Cassie: Yeah. Actually, I'm engaged. Earl: Unlikely.

RV (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Cassie, age 5: Daddy? Bob: Yeah, baby? Cassie, age 5: I'm never going to get married. Bob: Why not? It's not as bad as it looks. Cassie, age 5: Because I always want to live here with you. Bob: Well, you know. One day, you're going to grow up, meet a wonderful guy, and you're going to get married. But you and I will always be best friends. [kisses Cassie] Good night, Cassie. [turns lamp off] Cassie: Dad, could you be any more of a dork? Bob: Cassie, do you know where this girl lives, or do you just think you know? Cassie: Oh, I know where she lives, I just know one way to get there, and you refuse to go that way. Bob: Because it's a stupid way. Cassie: Yes, if you consider actually getting there stupid. Jamie: Why don't you use the navigation? Bob: Because our daughter, Sacajawea back there, doesn't know the address or the name of the street. She just knows it as "the one next to the one with the fountain". Carl: Dad, Cassie just gave you the finger. [Cassie elbows Carl to shut him up]

RV (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Jamie: Did you take out the roasts from last night?! Bob: I guess not. Jamie: Well, what's the plan? Cassie: Let's give him Carl! Maybe he'll eat him and leave. Carl: [angrily] Let's give him you! Maybe he's on the South bitch diet! Bob: Good one.

RV (film), CC BY-SA 4.0