Quotes

Dialogue

Mother: [looking outside the window] Car's here! Father: It's 9 o'clock already! We're going to have a miss our flight! Mother: Traveller's cheques... Father: You have the tickets, darling? Mother: Tabitha, did you feed Roddy? Tabitha: Oops. Mother: [off-screen] I just know we've forgotten something. Tabitha: [enters her bedroom, looking for her brother, Roddy in his dollhouse] Roddy, where are you? [spilling in food] We'll be back in a few days, so here's enough food for you. Here's a little more. Mother: [off-screen] Tabitha! Tabitha: Here's a little more. Mother: [off-screen] I hope you're not overfeeding him. Tabitha: Of course not, Mum. [dumps the whole bag of rat feed into Roddy's dollhouse] Father: [off-screen] Come on, Tabitha! Tabitha: Bye, Roddy! Father: [off-screen] We don't want to miss our holiday. Tabitha: I'm coming, I'm coming! [runs out of the house and closes the door] Roddy: [sniffing, sliding down, opening the door] When the cat's away, the mice will play! The holid

Dialogue

Roddy: Wake up. I think there's someone in the house. Sarge, wake up! Action Figure: Approaching enemy lines. I'm armed and ready. Roddy: At ease, soldier. Action Figure: Give up your weapons of mass destruction! Come get me, enemy of freedom! Roddy: Stop it! That's enough! Shush! Action Figure: I'm armed and ready. Tell Mom I... love... her.

Dialogue

Do you like sea food?

Dialogue

Roddy: Swimmingly? Rupert: Be seeing you, my friend. [flushing Roddy down the drain] You plonker! You think I don't know a toilet when I see one? You are going to flush me down the loo! Roddy: No! It's a big jacuzzi! Deluxe model! Rupert: Then you won't mind if I get the bubbles going. Roddy: No! Not the lever! Have mercy! No, I can't swim! Rupert: Bon voyage, me old cream cracker. Hold your nose. Roddy: Stop, stop, stop! You can't do this! Rupert: You are goin' to try and flush me! Let's see how do you like it! Goldfish: [Roddy picks up Goldfish] Have you seen my Dad? Roddy: [throws his goldfish, he realizes he's heading a waterfall, falling into the river, yelling] <big>AAAAAAAAAAH!!</big> [drowning, dodging the teeth, swimming up, grabbing a chocolate bar, freaking out, then realising what it is. He realizes he's heading for a waterfall of tunnel, and tries to swim backwards] Oh! No! No! (Help! Help! Help! Fish me out!) [hits a pipe] Um... [falling in the water] Aah! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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Roddy: Hello? Uh, permission to come aboard? [boards the Jammy Dodger boat] Ahoy there? Uh... [looks at the hand, moving up and down, walking to him, moving around him, grabs him, and brings him over to a shadowy figure] Sorry. I didn't mean to intrude, Mr. Captain, Skipper Thingy. Rita: Hey! [revealing herself from the shadows] That's Miss Captain Skipper Thingy to you. Roddy: Oops. Rita: What are you doing on my boat? Roddy: Look, I've had a really bad day and I just need your help. You see, I've been thrown out of my own home, I've been flushed down my own toilet. [the hand puts a finger over his mouth] Rita: Yeah, thank you, too much information. I've got my own problems, mate. Spike: [off-screen] She's around here somewhere! Rita: [presses a button] Stay down. And keep quiet. Roddy: Why? Who are we hiding from? Rita: [covers his mouth] I said quiet! There's rats after me who'd like to kill me. Roddy: Well, I'll contain my amazement. [Rita groans in annoyance] All right, all right.

Dialogue

Rita: [as Whitey grabs her and Roddy] Let me go, you pink-eyed freak! [violently kicks him in the face with her foot] Whitey: I'm upset now. [looks at Roddy] Roddy: [shrieks] Whatever's going on, I assure you, I'm not involved! I'm just an innocent bystander. Spike: Rita, Rita, Rita. [laughing] Thought you could give us the slip? [slips and falls] What are you looking at? Keep still! Come on, then! Right! [notices Roddy] Who have we got here? Whitey: I believe he said his name was Millicent Bystander.

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Roddy: Rita, will you please tell these people I'm not involved in this? Rita: Fine. All right, all right, listen up. This gentleman, he's not from around here. Roddy: Thank you. Rita: Just look how nicely he's dressed. Roddy: Ah, thank you. Rita: And why? Because he's an international jewel thief! Roddy: Precisely... What? No! No, no!

Dialogue

Toad: Hello, Rita. Rita: Hello, handsome. Toad: [gestures to Roddy] And who is this? Is your new boyfriend a waiter? Rita: Boyfriend?! Roddy: Waiter?! Toad: [chuckles] Heh-heh-heh! [snaps fingers and Spike gives him the ruby] The prize returns to me! Hoo-hoo! Did you imagine that I would let you steal it from me? Rita: What?! That jewel belongs to my father, and you know it! Ahh! Toad: Your father? A good-for-nothing scavenger, just like his daughter! Roddy: Uh, excuse me. Actually, I'm the one that found your ruby. So, you, um... Perharps you'd be generous enough to repay the favour and help me to get home! Fly-Lady: HELP ME!!! Toad: Dispose of them. Roddy: No, no, no, please! I just want to get home to Kensington! [the Toad pauses] Toad: Kensington? The Royal Borough? Up top? Roddy: [nervously], Er, yes, up top. Toad: [delighted] Huzzah! A man of quality! Roddy: Well, finally. Somebody gets it.

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Toad: Prepare to meet your maker, your ice maker. [cackles sinisterly] Whitey: [chuckling] Makes me laugh every time. Toad: Oh, shut that door. Roddy: Liquid nitrogen? That will freeze us instantly! Rita: There's a paper clip in my back pocket. See if you can get it. [cries out in shock, then looks at Roddy, annoyed with gritted teeth] In the pocket, in the pocket! Spike: Blimey, it's cold. Whitey: That's why I wore me mittens. Spike: Huh? Hitmen don't wear mittens! Take them off! You're embarrassing me! Whitey: Well, it's all right for you. You've got little hands. Roddy: Got it! Whitey: They don't get as cold. Spike: I ain't got little hands! Whitey: Yeah, you have. You've got lady hands. Spike: Well, they might be small, but they're lethal weapons, these! Whitey: You've got your mother hands.

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Rita: What are you, some kind of rat boomerang?! Give me back my ruby! Roddy: I haven't got your ruby! [the ruby falls in his hand; Rita gasps] Okay. Well, now I've got your ruby. [Rita gasps, then she tries to get it back from Roddy, but Roddy holds it from the edge of the boat and Rita gasps once more] Rita: Please be careful. That ruby means a lot to me. It's priceless. Roddy: Hold on... [inspects the ruby] It's a fake. Rita: [laughs] No, it's blooming not. It's real! Roddy: No, no, no, look. It's...it's...it's just glass. Rita: It's real! Roddy: Fake. Rita: Real! Roddy: Fake. Rita: Real! Roddy: Fake. Rita: Real! Roddy: Fake. Rita: Real! Roddy: Fake. Rita: Real! Roddy: Fake. Rita: Real! Roddy: Look, look, look, look, look, look. You can tell. Watch this. [breaks the ruby; Rita shrieks in shock, they then watch the ruby pieces sink into in the water] There, you see? I mean, you can't break a real ruby. [Rita snarls furiously at him; nervously] Ah. Right. I probably shouldn't have don

Dialogue

Toad: Where are those idiots?! [to his tadpoles] It's so hard to get hope these days, my boys. Yes, that's right. [The Toad speaks in a baby voice] Oh, come on out, my lovelies. Cheer your old dad up. Poor Daddy, surrounded by flithy rats in this joyless, sunless void! But don't worry, my little men. Daddy will get rid of them all! He will. They'll all be deady-weady. [The Toad kisses the jar, and his tadpoles hug their daddy from inside. Spike and Whitey arrive. The Toad hides his jar, but still has his small voice.] Did you find it? Spike: Eh? Toad: [snaps out of it] Ah! Did you find it? Spike: Well, we got most of it, boss. [he and Whitey show the Toad pieces of the ruby. The Toad slaps it out of their hands] Toad: [snaps out of it again] Forget the ruby! It's the master cable that I want. The one that grubby creature Rita took. Spike and Whitey: Oh, no! Toad: Without it, My plan is <big>RUINED!</big> Spike: Okay, boss. Forget the ruby. Ruby's gone. See? See? Moving on. We are now y

Dialogue

Liam: [seeing Roddy outside the window] Oi, Mum! There's a Peeping Tom outside! Grandma Malone: Tom?! Ooh, it's Tom Jones! Mrs. Malone: Mother, it's not Tom Jones. Rita: That's... That's just my passenger. Mrs. Malone: He's very good-looking. Rita: He is not coming in.

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Rita: I'm not saying it isn't risky. Mr. Malone: But it's impossible, Rita. No one's ever got past the rapids at Hyde Park. Rita: Dad, Dad, Dad! He's gonna pay us! Mr. Malone: For the last time, we don't need the money! Cockroach: A new stove might be nice?

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Rita's Sister: So, you're from Up Top? Roddy: Yes. Mrs. Malone: (You know,) I've met one of your lot before. Roddy: Oh, really? Mrs. Malone: Used to be some old lady's pet. Roddy: That's nice. Mrs. Malone: Terribly lonely for him, though. He had no one to talk to. Grandma Malone: [hugs him] No one to cuddle with! Shocky: No one to shocky. Mrs. Malone: Well, that's no life, is it?

Dialogue

Rita: We Malones, never go back on the word. Liam: He's gonna steal your boat. Rita: He won't steal my boat. Liam: He's stealing your boat. Rita: He isn't stealing... Liam: He stole your boat. Rita: What?! Liam: He's like Robin Hood in reverse. Rita: [calling out to Roddy when he steals the Jammy Dodger] Oi! I thought we had a deal! Roddy: So did I!

Dialogue

Spike: Where are they hiding? Think. Think. Whitey: To find a rat, you got to think like a rat. [acts like a rat and runs to chew a chair] Thimblenose Ted: Hey, guys. I've had a tip-off. They're heading west to Kensington. Spike: [gets an idea] Bingo! Whitey: Scrabble! [laughs] Spike: Enough games. To the ratmobiles!

Dialogue

Roddy: [angrily shaking the boat's engine] Just start, you worthless old pile of rubbish! You useless, unreliable... Rita: [off-screen] Untrustworthy, double-crossing, two-faced, conniving little toe-rag! Roddy: [pops up; laughs sarcastically] Oh! So I'm the double-crosser? Oh, yes, that's rich! I overheard everything. Yes, you and your family were gonna sell me to The Toad! Rita: What? You dipstick! That was my stupid little brother's plan. And no one listens to him. Roddy: Ah, must have missed that part. Rita: How could you think I'd sell you out? When I make a deal, I make a deal. Your hair's on fire. Roddy: What? Ow! Ah! Rita, look! I'm sorry, alright? I was wrong. And I think we should just put it behind us. Rita: Okay, I supposed I can put it behind me.

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Roddy: Look, I really want to help out more around here, huh? Just give me a job. Anything, um... Engineer and navigator. I could drive for a bit if you like? Rita: Hmmmph!

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Roddy: Whoaaaaa! Waaaaah! Rita: <big>HOLD ON, RODDY!!!</big> Spike: <big>GET THAT CABLE, LADS!!!</big> Roddy: <big>WHOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!</big>

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Whitey: Are you sure about this, Spike? These things are dangerous. Spike: Danger is my middle name! Whitey: I thought it was Leslie.

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Spike: Any last requests? Roddy: Yes, yes. Could you fly quite suddenly off the boat, screaming like a girl? Spike: What? Whitey: Oh, dear. Whitey: Do you think the boss will be angry with us? Toad: [outraged] <big>YOU INCOMPETENT CHEESE-EATERS! YOU LET THEM ESCAPE?!</big> Toad: [annoyed] It's obvious I should never have sent rodents to do an amphibian's job. Where is he? Why is he always late? Ooh. [Noticing a fly, he tried to catch it with his tongue, but another pink tongue appeared and caught the fly.] Le Frog? [He looks up and a shadow of a male frog is on the pipe. He leaped and slid across the glass window.] Le Frog: Bonjour. Toad: [annoyed] You're late, Le Frog. Le Frog: Fashionably late, my annoying English cousin. I know no other way. Toad: Now, listen. Rita and her new accomplice have stolen something irreplaceable. Spike: All right, boss! We've got another one! [plugs in the cable, electrocuting him and fell into a box of cables] Toad: A master cable of unique design and pu

Dialogue

Le Frog: We leave immediately! [walks off] Henchfrog: What about dinner? Le Frog: [comes back] We leave... in five hours.

Dialogue

Rita: Tell me about yourself, Roddy. Roddy: Well, there's not much to tell. Rita: You know everything about me, warts and all. I don't even know what you do. Roddy: I'm... I'm in a boy band. Rita: What? Roddy: Yeah. Yeah, I'm the posh one.

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Le Frog: Okay, men. To action! Henchfrogs: WE SURRENDER! Le Frog: No! Not that one, you idiots! The kung-fu thing!' Henchfrogs: Ohh.

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Roddy: Hello! Hello, hello, hello, anybody home? Wouldn't you know it just when you need them all out every one of them. Rita: Wait! Wait, wait, wait.

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Right away, Sir!

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Rita: Roddy, do you think we can talk about this after you rescue me? Roddy: Of course. There's no time. When that whistle blows, and when everyone Up Top goes to the toilet, it's gonna <big>FLUSH AWAY THE WHOLE CITY!</big> Rita: I know. And my family are all down there. Roddy: We've got to warn everyone.

Dialogue

Toad: So, you thought you could make a fool of The Toad, eh? [a rubber glove lands on the Toad, causing him to yelp in panic] Rita: You don't need us for that. Toad: You think you're so clever, don't you? Well, I'll be the one laughing when every last revolting rat is flushed away! For I shall repopulate the city... with these! [pulls open the curtains, revealing a tank of lots of tadpoles, and everyone reacts in disgust] Whitey: [disgusted] Nasty. Tadpole: Is this the glorious amphibian dawn, Dad? Toad: Anything for you, my little man. Tadpole: Can I have a pony? Toad: No! Tadpole: A puppy? Toad: We'll talk about it. Tadpole: Can we talk about it now? Toad: No! [all his tadpoles in the tank start clamouring for a puppy] No, you can't all have puppies, please! Daddy's working! Roddy: [whispering to Rita] We need to get downstairs and pull out that cable. Rita: How? It's impossible. Roddy: England is winning. Anything is possible! [takes apart the cord] Spike: Help! [slips on ice] Waaaa

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Roddy: Feeling a little tongue-tied? Toad: Impossible! Rita: Toodle-oo! Le Frog: Ohh. Toad: <big>NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!</big> Roddy, Rita and Le Frog: (screaming) <big>WHOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!</big> Mr. Malone: [turns around, seeing the giant tidal wave coming towards the town; alarmed] WAVE! WAVE! Crowd: England! Mr. Malone: NO, GIANT WAVE!!! Roddy: Please work, please work, please work!

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Rita: You're a hero, Roddy. Le Frog: Pfft. Big deal. [Roddy lets him go and gets tongue-tied up with The Toad] Toad: [threateningly; last words] You wretched vermin! I'll make you pay for this! Le Frog: [also his last words] Aw, give it a rest, cousin...and get your kids a puppy. Roddy: Rita, I was wondering if… you do build a Jammy Dodger Mark II… you wouldn't happen to need a first mate, would you?

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Rita: Where are going? Roddy: I have no idea! But we're gonna get there really fast! Grandma Malone: [swimming fast to catch up] I'm coming, Mr. Jones, I'm coming!

Dialogue

Sid: [while lounging on the sofa] Ah, this is the life, eh? [notices the light turning on] Tabitha: Roddy, I'm home! [Sid gasps as he sees Tabitha] And I've brought you a new friend! [a cat appears in Tabitha's arms and meows, causing Sid to scream in shock before the credits roll]