Cobra Kai

Miguel: Hey, I just wanted to say thank you. Johnny: Alright, well, you said it. Miguel: So last night, was that, like, tae kwon do, or Jiu-Jitsu, or MMA, or something? Johnny: It's karate. Old school karate. Miguel: Do you think you could teach me? Johnny: What? No. Miguel: What? Come on, when school starts, those guys are gonna make my life miserable. Johnny: It's not my problem. Miguel: If I just knew a little bit of what you knew then I would be-- Johnny: Forget it! I don't do karate anymore! All right? Besides, I need to find a job. Miguel: Well, you can open your own karate school. Johnny: It's called a dojo. Miguel: Well, you could open your own dojo. Johnny: Look, I'm not getting into this with you, all right? I'm not even sure I'm allowed to be around kids right now.

Cobra Kai, CC BY-SA 4.0

Anoush: Wait, is this the karate guy? The guy from the tournament? Louie: Oh, this is the guy whose ass you kicked. Daniel: It was a really close match. But, if you want to get technical, I kicked his face. [Chuckles] I'm just busting your chops. Johnny: It was an illegal kick. Daniel: Oh, illegal? Really? Come on, what about that elbow to my knee? Johnny: Yeah, I got a warning. You got the win.

Cobra Kai, CC BY-SA 4.0

Johnny: Cobra Kai isn't just about karate. It's about a way of life. [Points to wall with "Strike First Strike Hard No Mercy" written on it] Take that first lesson. Striking first is the initial step towards victory. Okay, like when you're at a party, and you see a hot babe. You don't wait for some other guy to go talk to her first, do you? Miguel: I mean, I've never been to a party, so... Johnny: Big surprise. Alright, look, striking first is about being aggressive. Alright? If you're not aggressive, then you're being a pussy. And you don't wanna be a pussy! You wanna have balls! Miguel: Don't you think you're doing a lot of genderizing? Johnny: ...what? Miguel: Oh, sorry. Don't you think you're doing a lot of genderizing, sensei? Johnny: No, what the hell are you talking about? Miguel: Oh, uh, my guidance counselor says that certain words can perpetuate the sexist world view that can trigger- Johnny: QUIET! From now on, you won't listen to your guidance counselor, you're gonna listen

Cobra Kai, CC BY-SA 4.0

Daniel: Some things never change. Johnny: Yeah? What are you talking about? Daniel: I heard you beat up a bunch of teenagers in that parking lot out there. Johnny: Oh, that. No, I didn't beat up any teenagers. I kicked the shit out of a bunch of assholes who deserved it. Daniel: Wow. Johnny Lawrence calling someone else an asshole. That's rich, man. Johnny: Yeah, what's that supposed to mean? Daniel: Alright, look. I'm not here to rehash the past. Just stay away from my daughter's friends. Johnny: Your daughter's friends? Yeah, that makes sense. Nice company she keeps. Daniel: What the hell is that supposed to mean? Johnny: It means those friends of hers were wailing on a kid half their size. Maybe you don't know your daughter as well as you think you do. Get your house in order, LaRusso. Daniel: Who the hell do you think you're talking to? Miguel: Bathroom's clean! [walks into the scene] Is there anything else you need me to do? Miguel: I'm sorry, Sensei. I... Daniel: Sensei? Really?

Cobra Kai, CC BY-SA 4.0

Miguel: I wish I could show my mom what I did to those boards, but if she knew where I was right now, she'd kill me. What's wrong with you? Johnny: [After reading "Final Notice" bills] Nothing. Put your costume on, I'm driving you to that dance, and we're gonna pick up some more students. [Sees Miguel's horribly homemade halloween costume] What the hell is that? Miguel: It's my halloween costume. My ya-ya made it. It started off as Deadpool, then I think it was Spider-Man, and then it just kinda became some generic superhero. Johnny: Yeah, a poor one at that. You're Poor-Man. Miguel: Yeah. Johnny: Well, I can't let you go out like that. We have a reputation to uphold. Miguel: What do you suggest?

Cobra Kai, CC BY-SA 4.0

Daniel: What do you think you're doing? Johnny: I'm promoting my business. Why don't you try minding yours? Daniel: Minding mine? You know what, look, this is ridiculous, okay? We can both be adults here. I just don't know why you'd ever wanna bring back Cobra Kai after what your sensei did to you. Johnny: Because I'm not Kreese...and the lessons worked. Daniel: "Strike first, no mercy?" Real good lessons. If you think I'm gonna let you fill these kids heads with that garbage, you're nuts, man.

Cobra Kai, CC BY-SA 4.0