The Dirty Dozen

This war was not started for your private gratification, and you can be damned sure it's not being run for your personal convenience, either!

The Dirty Dozen, CC BY-SA 4.0

Major John Reisman: [Kinder has just finished a psychiatric evaluation of Reisman's troops] So what does that give you? Capt. Stuart Kinder: Doesn't give me anything. But along with these other results, it gives you just about the most twisted, anti-social bunch of psychopathic deformities I have ever run into! And the worst, the most dangerous of the bunch, is Maggott. You've got one religious maniac, one malignant dwarf, two near-idiots... and the rest I don't even wanna think about! Major John Reisman: Well, I can't think of a better way to fight a war. Capt. Stuart Kinder: These people don't know their enemy is the Germans. They think the enemy is their own United States Army! Major John Reisman: Maybe that's because the Germans haven't done anything to them yet.

The Dirty Dozen, CC BY-SA 4.0

Major John Reisman: Any questions? Maggot: Suh? Do we have to eat with niggahs? Sergeant Clyde Bowren: [as Reisman exits the room] What's going on, sir? Major John Reisman: Oh, the gentleman from the South had a question about the dining arrangements. He and his comrades are discussing place settings now.

The Dirty Dozen, CC BY-SA 4.0

Major John Reisman: Which one of you guys wants to be a general? [Pinkley raises his hand] Pinkley? Pinkley: What kind of general, sir? Major John Reisman: Just a plain, ordinary, every day, home-lovin' American general. Pinkley: I'd rather be a civilian, sir.

The Dirty Dozen, CC BY-SA 4.0

Major John Reisman: Posey, what did they lock you up for? I mean, what did you do? Samson Posey: I already told you that sir. Major John Reisman: Well tell me again. I'm sure your friends over here would like to know too. Samson Posey: This fella kept pushing me. I don't like to be pushed so I hit him. Major John Reisman: Killed a man with your bare hands because he shoved you? Samson Posey: I only hit him once. Major John Reisman: Only him him once. And drove his jawbone right through his brain because he pushed him.

The Dirty Dozen, CC BY-SA 4.0

Major John Reisman: How come you speak German? Joseph T. Wladislaw: My old man came from Silesia. He didn't speak German, he didn't dig coal. If he didn't dig coal, he didn't eat.

The Dirty Dozen, CC BY-SA 4.0