Baywatch

Matt Brody: Hey, I'm Matt Brody! Summer Quinn: And not a single fuck was given...

Baywatch (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Matt Brody: Hey. I'm more motivated than ever. So you're going to make me guess your name? Are you following me? Summer Quinn: I was actually just going to ask you the same thing. Okay. Look, you're hot. I may resist for a while, but we both know eventually I'll give in. So why don't we just skip that. Why don't you put a baby in me? Now. Matt Brody: You know, honestly... I was thinking dinner first. But we could try the baby thing, if you want. Summer Quinn: You are trying. Way too hard.

Baywatch (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Mitch Buchannon: Hey, fresh face. You here for the qualifiers? Matt Brody: Uh, no, no, I'm not trying out. I'm actually already on the team. Mitch Buchannon: You're already on this team? Matt Brody: I'm Matt Brody. Ready for duty. Mitch Buchannon: "Ready for duty"? Oh, okay. Um, you got any papers or anything like that? Matt Brody: I do. There you go. Mitch Buchannon: Oh, it's a permission slip. Literally. "Dear Mitch, I am pleased to write you on behalf of Mr. Matt Brody." Right. Well, no free passes. Matt Brody: Yeah. Whoa. Mitch Buchannon: At all. Yeah, 'cause I don't give a shit. Matt Brody: I legit needed those for my taxes. Mitch Buchannon: What you need is to understand that if you're going to be on this team, you got to earn it. Matt Brody: Really? Mitch Buchannon: Yeah. So, why don't we start this whole thing over, just like gentlemen? Where you from, One Direction? Matt Brody: Um... Iowa? Iowa? You heard of it? Mitch Buchannon: Yeah, I know what it is. Hey, Steph. Stephanie H

Baywatch (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Summer Quinn: [about CJ Parker] Why does she always look like she's running in slow-mo? Ronnie Greenbaum: You see it too? Summer Quinn: And she always looks wet, but not too wet. Ronnie Greenbaum: Right? She's the reason I believe in God.

Baywatch (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Summer Quinn: Did you just, uh look at my boobs? Matt Brody: Ah, that was not my intention...I didn't, uh, stare directly at them. [looks down at her] Summer Quinn: [laughs] You're looking at them right now. Matt Brody: No I didn't. [looks down again] Now I did. 'Cause you're talking about them. Summer Quinn: [bouncing her breasts] Testing... Oh, failed. Oh my god. We're gonna be in swimsuits a lot, so... Matt Brody: Yeah. Summer Quinn: If it's going to be a problem for you... Matt Brody: There's not a problem at all, for me. Summer Quinn: Yeah. Matt Brody: Cool. Summer Quinn: Alright. You just looked at them again. [walks off] Matt Brody: No, I didn't...I was...I didn't...I mean, when you point them out like that... It's a compliment, if you think about it, sort of.

Baywatch (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Mitch Buchannon: My gut says there's some bad shit going on over there, and my balls say we need to go over there and check it out. Matt Brody: Your balls said that? Mitch Buchannon: Yes, they did. Matt Brody: Okay, my balls say [in a high-pitched voice] "Just take it easy right here. Just chill." Mitch Buchannon: Why the fuck do your balls sound like three-year-old girls? Matt Brody: I don't know, man. That's just how they talk. But they're wise.

Baywatch (film), CC BY-SA 4.0