The Crazy Ones

Zack Cropper: Sydney! Hey, listen- [Aside to Andrew] Hi. [Returning to Sydney] You know how I like to be conjugal on occasion, sometimes for the benefit of the agency, other times it's less philanthropic- Andrew knows- Andrew Keanelly: Don't involve me in this. Zach: Well, last night I did some conjugating on behalf of the company. She was present, I was perfect, it was all very progressive- Sydney Roberts: Zach- Zach: [Continuing] She works in account management at Shyat- Nice girl, I think you'd quite like her- Sydney: Zach. Zach: [Continuing] They met with McDonald's yesterday. We're getting fired, that's what today's meeting is about. Sydney: What? My father's in with them right now. Lauren Slotsky: Actually, he's not- I've been flashing them, like, for 20 minutes. [To the group] I mean that's assistant stuff, right? Part of my job? Andrew: It is. Zack: Yeah, I would do it.

The Crazy Ones, CC BY-SA 4.0

[On the phone] I don't quite understand... They're saying she won't do it? At least, I think that's what they're saying. [Hanging up and turning to Sydney] Shakira's people, they're bilingual so I'm being denied in two different languages. We're screwed. Jennifer Lopez wants to be paid in diamonds, Maraiah's in an ashram, Adele's British, and... P!nk threatened me.

The Crazy Ones, CC BY-SA 4.0

Kelly Clarkson: You're looking to remake you're brand, I'm looking to remake mine. Simon: Rebranding! Perfect, that's what we do! Zach: No one does it better. Kelly: See the old Kelly- Simon: Oh, please Classic Kelly! Zach: Kelly Classic. Kelly: Whatever. I wanna sing about sex.

The Crazy Ones, CC BY-SA 4.0

Zack: We- just need to come up with a meat related sex song. Simon: For a family restaurant, and how hard could that be, really? I mean it almost writes itself when you think warm buns, a hamburger patty- pat my patty. Zach: Oh, like a pickle, like a p-p-p-p Simon: Stick a pickle in the bun and the fun's begun!

The Crazy Ones, CC BY-SA 4.0