Mafia Mamma

Jenny: Kristin, what do you masturbate to? Kristin: Italian cooking shows. I mean, more specifically, "Stanley Tucci: Searching for Italy". There was this one episode where he went to this burrata factory and it was all creamy and he got his hands in all the milky stuff. It was so...

Mafia Mamma, CC BY-SA 4.0

Paul: This is really hard for me to admit, but, I have - this illness. All I want to do is have sex. Kristin: I mean, I want to have sex too. We haven't had sex in, like, three years! Paul: Yeah, I know, but, what I mean with a new person.

Mafia Mamma, CC BY-SA 4.0

Kristin: Shouldn't I stay here and work on my marriage? Jenny: You should work on getting your pussy pounded.

Mafia Mamma, CC BY-SA 4.0

Kristin: It's such an amazing time in your life. You can really become anyone you want to be. Domenick: Mom. Kristin: You could change the world. Domenick: Mom. Kristin: You could colonize the Mars!

Mafia Mamma, CC BY-SA 4.0

Kristin: I just need a vacation. I just really want my: Eat, Pray, Fuck! Bianca: Eat, Pray, Fuck? Kristin: Yeah, it's a - play on words, you know, the book, "Eat Pray Love". Aldo: Yeah, it's a very uplifting and moving memoir by Elizabeth Gilbert. Kristin: Yes! Yes, see, he knows! I want to make wine and I want to eat pasta and be romanced and... Bianca: But, you came for a funeral. Kristin: Yeah, I mean, you know, after the funeral.

Mafia Mamma, CC BY-SA 4.0

Kristin: [Dante stomps on Kristen's cell phone] How is Lorenzo supposed to get in touch with me? How will I ever have sex! Bianca: [Slaps Kristin] You cannot be speaking to random strangers. It's too dangerous. Kristin: He's not a stranger. He's gorgeous.

Mafia Mamma, CC BY-SA 4.0