Parenthood

Frank: Gil, you have a good memory. Uh, was it yours or Helen's or Susan's wedding I got drunk at? Gil: It was all three, Dad. Congratulations. Frank: Well, which one did I punch the band leader? Gil: That was mine. We have photos. I'm having them blown up for the commitment hearings. Frank: Well, you think he's funny. Well, when he was a kid, he wasn't as funny. Stayed in his room all day. Boy, you were a moody little son of a bitch. Gil: [sarcastically] Gee, I wonder why.

Parenthood (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Taylor: Mommy what was that? Karen: That was an electrical ear cleaner. Taylor: It was kinda big. Grandma: It sure was.

Parenthood (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Julie: He said that he loved me. Helen: Men say that. They all say that. Then they cum.

Parenthood (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

College Student #1: Someone's gone to the roof of the bell tower with a rifle! Dean at College: It's Kevin Buckman! His father totally screwed him up! College Student #2: What is he yelling? Kevin, Age 21: YOU MADE ME PLAY SECOND BASE! Gil: [through bullhorn] Son, I'm sorry. I did all the best I could. Gil: Nice shot son! Gil: [police] It's important to be supportive. [to Kevin] Come on let's sing one of the old tunes. "When you're sliding into home and your pants are full of foam, Diarrhea - "

Parenthood (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Kevin, Age 21: All of this I have one thing to credit; when I was a kid and my father made me play second base. Thank you, Dad! Gil: Thank you, son!

Parenthood (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Susan: Helen? Oh, the door was unlocked...[sees the sex action on the television] Grandma: What channel is this? Helen: No Gran, this is a tape. Grandma: [to Susan] She needs a man now! Helen: Gran, this isn't mine. I don't watch this! Grandma: [to Susan again as they are leaving the room and speaking of the sex action on the television] One of those men reminded me of your Grandpa. God bless him!

Parenthood (film), CC BY-SA 4.0