Shanghai Noon

Father, is this my husband-to-be? He's a toad. If the emperor is so fond of him, why doesn't he marry him?

Shanghai Noon, CC BY-SA 4.0

Don't worry, it could be worse - he could be a white guy.

Shanghai Noon, CC BY-SA 4.0

Chon Wang: I got an idea: why don't I pretend I'm sick, and then you can attack the guard when they come in? Roy O'Bannon: Oh, you mean the sick prisoner routine? Does that still work in China? 'Cause here it's sorta been done to death.

Shanghai Noon, CC BY-SA 4.0

Chon Wang: See! I told you! Roy O'Bannon: No, you said "wet shirt don't break," not "piss shirt bend bar"!

Shanghai Noon, CC BY-SA 4.0

Roy O'Bannon: Ooooh... who's the pretty lady? Chon Wang: That's my wife! Roy O'Bannon: How long you been in this country? Chon Wang: Four days. Roy O'Bannon: Nice work.

Shanghai Noon, CC BY-SA 4.0

Roy O'Bannon: [adjusting Chon's cowboy hat] There, sort of a rakish angle. Chon Wang: How do I look? Roy O'Bannon: I think you look great! I think you look like a real cowboy. Very dapper - red bandana. Roy O'Bannon: Roy O'Bannon. Chon Wang: [shaking his hands] My name is Chon Wang. Roy O'Bannon: John Wayne? Chon Wang: Chon Wang. Roy O'Bannon: That's a terrible cowboy name! Chon Wang: Why? Roy O'Brannon: No, come on. That's not gonna work. That's horrible; that's so bad! And so's the ponytail!

Shanghai Noon, CC BY-SA 4.0