Saturday Night Live, season 24

Alex Trebek: 'Titles'. 'Famous Titles'. Sean Connery: Damn! Alex Trebek: And the answer is: 'This movie title is taken from the name of the book Gone with the Wind.' Mr. Connery. Sean Connery: Dolly Parton. Alex Trebek: 'Titles', Mr. Connery. Not 'Titties'. Sean Connery: Not a fan of the ladies, are you, Trebek?

Saturday Night Live/Season 24, CC BY-SA 4.0

Brock Lovett: Wow, that's uh, that's an amazing story, Rose. Brock: Three years I thought of nothing but Titanic, but I never got it, I never let it in. Old Rose: Well, now you know the whole story. Old Rose: Yes, I am. Lizzy: Come on. Brock: Whoa, whoa, hang on a second. You left out the part about what happened to the diamond necklace? Old Rose: Oh, you mean the Heart of the Ocean? Well, I'm afraid that that's another story for another time. Brock: [concerned] Well, we got the time now. [to Keith] You got the time, Keith? Keith: Hell, yeah! Brock: [passively] See? We got plenty of time. Old Rose: [nervously] Well, you know... they call Titanic the ship of dreams, and... Brock: [annoyed] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's just great. Look, Rose. [angrily] I've been listening to this hack romance novel crapathon all afternoon. Now enough's enough. Where's the necklace? Lizzy: Look, my grandmother needs to sleep, okay? Brock: Hey, Granny can sleep for the rest of her life after she tells us

Saturday Night Live/Season 24, CC BY-SA 4.0

Live, from New York, it's Gloatin' Time!

Saturday Night Live/Season 24, CC BY-SA 4.0

Sean Connery: I've got to ask you about 'The Penis Mightier'. Alex Trebek: The what? No. No, no, that's 'The Pen Is Mightier'. Sean Connery: Gussy it up however you want, Trebek, what matters is: does it work? Will it really mighty my penis, man?! Alex Trebek: It's not a product, Mr. Connery. Sean Connery: Because I've ordered devices like that before - wasted a pretty penny, I don't mind telling you. And if 'The Penis Mightier' works, I'll order a dozen. Alex Trebek: It's not a penis mightier, Mr. Connery. There's no such thing. Alex Trebek: No! No I'm not! Sean Connery: Well, you're sitting on a gold mine, Trebek! Alex Trebek: Let's see what all of you wrote. We'll start with you, Mr. Cage. You wrote... and your podium's gone. Nicolas Cage: I don't know where it went. I'm confused. Alex Trebek: You lost your podium? I don't see... You know what? I don't care. Let's move on. Calista Flockhart. Alex Trebek: Settle down, just relax. You wrote...nothing. And your wager? Nothing! Calista

Saturday Night Live/Season 24, CC BY-SA 4.0