Quotes

Dialogue

Female Party Guest: I finally had an orgasm, and my doctor told me it was the wrong kind. Isaac: Did you have the wrong kind? Really? I've never had the wrong kind, ever. My worst one was right on the money.

Dialogue

Isaac: Has anybody read that Nazis are gonna march in New Jersey? Ya know? I read it in the newspaper. We should go down there, get some guys together, ya know, get some bricks and baseball bats, and really explain things to 'em. Party Guest: There was this devastating satirical piece on that on the op-ed page of the Times, just devastating. Isaac: Whoa, whoa. A satirical piece in the Times is one thing, but bricks and baseball bats really gets right to the point of it. Party Guest Helen: Oh, but really biting satire is always better than physical force. Isaac: No, physical force is always better with Nazis.

Dialogue

Mary: You don't need a male. Two mothers are absolutely fine. Isaac: Really? Because I always feel very few people survive one mother.

Dialogue

Mary: I guess I should straighten my life out, huh? I mean, Donnie my analyst is always telling me--- Isaac: You call your analyst Donnie? Mary: Yeah, I call him Donnie. Isaac: Donnie, your analyst? I call mine Dr. Chomsky, you know? Either that or he hits me with a ruler.

Dialogue

Mary: Don't psychoanalyze me. I pay a doctor for that. Isaac: Hey, you call that guy that you talk to a doctor? I mean, you don't get suspicious when your analyst calls you at home at three in the morning and weeps into the telephone? Mary: Alright, so he's unorthodox. He's a highly qualified doctor. Isaac: He done a great job on you, you know? Your self-esteem is a notch below Kafka.

Dialogue

Isaac: What kind of dog do you have? Mary: The worst. It's a dachshund. You know, it's a penis substitute for me. Isaac: I would've thought then in your case it would've been a Great Dane.

Dialogue

Mary: I'm honest, what do you want? I say what's on my mind and if you can't take it, well then fuck off! Isaac: And I like the way you express yourself too, you know? It's pithy yet degenerate. You get many dates?

Dialogue

Yale: You are so self-righteous, you know. I mean we're just people. We're just human beings, you know? You think you're God. Isaac: I . . . I gotta model myself after someone.