Quotes
Con Air
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Dialogue
Guard Falzon: Well, welcome aboard. My, my; as I look around I see a lot of celebrities among us. I see eleven Current Affairs, two Hard Copies and a genuine Geraldo interviewee, [gestures at Diamond Dog] but I gotta tell you gentlemen, none of this impresses me. Because we have rules on this aircraft and they're going to be enforced. It's a lot like kindergarten. You'll keep your hands to yourself, keep the decibel level down and, if any of you should feel the need to scream, spit, or bite, you get the treatment. Inmate: [spits at Falzon's feet] Fuck you, pig. Guard Falzon: [to another guard] Gag and bag this Nazi muffin. [strikes inmate before guards gag him and place a mesh bag over his head] You see, this kind of thing puts me in a foul mood. These rules will be enforced because I can't have trouble. If any of you so much as pass gas in my general direction, upsetting my delicate nasal passages, your testicles will become my personal property. That's pretty clear. Good. Cyrus the V
Dialogue
Johnny "Johnny 23" Baca: Shit, that's Garland Greene, man. Cameron Poe: The Marietta Mangler. Mike "Baby O" O'Dell: That skinny little man butchered thirty-some people up and down the eastern seaboard. They say the way he killed those people makes the Manson Family look like The Partridge Family! Poe: Well...he's on the right flight.
Dialogue
Cyrus: Good, now here are the rules, I'm going to ask a question and then you will ask a question. Larkin: Okay... What's your question? Cyrus: In Carson City, your boys were onto us; how? Malloy: One of the guards- [Larkin cuts him off] Larkin: One of the guards faked a heart attack and we had to remove his restraints, okay? Cyrus: Alright, now what's your question? Larkin: Where are you going with my plane, Cyrus? Cyrus: We're going to Disneyland. Larkin: You're lying, Cyrus. Cyrus: So are you, Vince. [mocks him by singsong] Ohh... nothing makes me sadder than the agent lost his bladder in the... aaaiirrrplane. [Larkin throws the headset he's using]
Dialogue
Garland Greene: Two went down. One came up. Poe: Wasn't my fault. Garland: Well, you don't have to tell me. Most murders are crimes of necessity rather than desire. But the great ones... Dahmer, Gacy, Bundy... they did it because it excited them. Poe: Don't you... I got nothing in common with them — with you! Don't you talk to me! They were insane! Garland: Now you're talking semantics. What if I told you insane was working a 50-hour week for 50 years, at the end of which they tell you to piss off. Ending up in some retirement village, hoping to die rather than suffering the indignity of trying to make it to the toilet on time. Wouldn't you consider that to be insane? Poe: Murdering 30 people, semantics or not, is insane. Garland: [smiles] One girl, I drove through three states wearing her head as a hat. Poe: It's my daughter's birthday, so please feel free not to share everything with me.
Dialogue
Cyrus the Virus: Thanks, Poe. You've proven to be a most useful mammal. Cameron Poe: "Many hands make light work." My daddy taught me that. Cyrus: You know what my daddy taught me? Poe: What's that? Cyrus: Nothin'. Poe: Self-educated man.
Dialogue
Cyrus: Considering my audience, I'm gonna make this very quick and very simple. [points with a stick] This is the boneyard. This is the hangar. This is our plane. Viking: What's that? [points at a rock] Cyrus: That's a rock. Viking: [looks embarrassed] Okay. Cyrus: The convoy will enter the boneyard here. Initially, we take out the first car [flicks off forward Coke can], then we take out the [hits can] last, creating a trap... an air-tight cage filled with lots and lots of dead people. Nathan, get everybody in position, yeah? [cons mobilize] And bring me those propane tanks!