Bones, season 4

Booth: Okay, yeah, I get it. You saw a whole lady's corpse when you were a little girl and you were fine. Brennan: Yes. Although, for some reason that I do not understand, I kept staging my own death. Pretending that I drowned in the bathtub, faking electrical shock. It really freaked my parents out. And once, when Russ found me hanging, he had to go see the school psychologist. Booth: [mildly sarcastic] But otherwise you were fine. Brennan: [earnestly] Yeah. Booth: Uh, the dog should be, you know, in the cage. He killed Seth Elliot. Brennan: Well, it's not his fault! He's actually a very nice dog, [cooing to Ripley] aren't you? [to Booth] He reminds me of you. Booth: Me? Brennan: He's got warm and reassuring brown eyes, and he's capable of great violence. Booth: Okay, great. Thanks a million. Brennan: On behalf of humankind and the universe, I'd like to apologize for what happened to Ripley. He was born a cute little puppy, and then the people who adopted him wanted to kill him becaus

Bones (season 4), CC BY-SA 4.0

Angela: These are children's shoes, but they're size 11. Cam: So you think our victim was a giant toddler? Brennan: That would show up in the bones. Cam: Sarcasm does not play well on the forensic platform. Sweets: These action figurines, they're awesome. Booth: Still living at home there, huh, Sweets? Sweets: No, I have my own place, and before that I lived with a woman. All right? Brennan: Was that woman your mother? Booth: Sweets, what are you doing? Sweets: I'm putting myself in the mind of an obsessive-compulsive in order to figure out where I might conceal a memory-enhancing, psychosexual proxy. Booth: Right, right. What's that mean? Brennan: Masturbatory aid. Booth: Oh. Check the shoes. Brennan: What? Sweets: Good. Brennan: He's not going to find it in the shoes. (Sweets holds up a photgraph) Do all boys keep their masturbatory aids in their shoes, or is that particular to you? Booth: Oh, that's for me to know and you to find out. Zack: I'm king of the loony bin! Hodgins: Yeah,

Bones (season 4), CC BY-SA 4.0

Cam: Any leads on who she is? Fisher: The hot chick is doing a sketch from the few pieces of skull I could locate and reconstruct. Cam: Hot chick? Fisher: Sorry. The other hot chick. Sweets: Well, uh, first I think it's important to find out what went wrong, why you were involved in an unsuccessful relationship. Angela: Who said it was unsuccessful? Sweets: You're not together anymore, are you? Angela: Do you love your parents? Sweets: Yes. Angela: But you don't live together anymore, does that mean your relationship with mom and dad was unsuccessful? Sweets: I don't think it's the same. Angela: I do. Sometimes you have to move on, whatever your feelings.

Bones (season 4), CC BY-SA 4.0

Brennan: Do you consider yourself one of my "brighter grad students," Mr. Nigel-Murray? Vincent: Yes, and so do you, Dr. Brennan. Booth: I am not calling this kid Mr. Nigel... anything. Cam: We already have Agent Booth to make lame jokes. Let's stick to facts. Vincent: The rods in the human eye are sensitive enough to detect the light emitted by a struck match from as much as a mile away on a clear night. Cam: Okay, let's stick to relevant facts. Vincent: The sockets have been ground down. Cam: Okay, that could be useful. [looks expectantly at Vincent, who smiles but says nothing] Especially if you have an explanation. Vincent: Plastic surgery. Oh, she had [gestures with his hands in front of his chest] fake boobs, too. Cam: "Sockets," "eyeballs," "boobs" — I wouldn't use these words when conferring with Dr. Brennan. Vincent: I know. With her it's all "supraorbital nimbus" and "mammary implants." But you seemed a more colloquial sort. Cam: Well, in that case, what about the "backbone"?

Bones (season 4), CC BY-SA 4.0

Booth: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What goes first? Brennan: Gun goes first. Booth: That's right. Booth: Don't say things like that. You're going to jinx me, all right? Brennan: [She walks up while Daisy and Cam are attempting to examine the body inside the sculpture, and dumps a giant container of flesh-eating beetles onto it. They look at her with consternation.] I was going to say that I had an accident over here, but I don't like lying. Cam: You dumped a bucket full of Dermestes beetles onto this work of art. They'll strip the flesh off our victim in no time. Brennan: [nodding] Within 30 hours. Am I fired? Hodgins: I'm totally shocked. Brennan: Yeah. They should not be doing that on the forensic platform. Cam: That's a method of termination I've never tried. But, bravo, Dr. Sweets.

Bones (season 4), CC BY-SA 4.0

Police Trainer: [after a flaming body lands on a police car] We're gonna need a... um... a fire extinguisher. Then maybe some sort of... trauma counselor? Brennan: [to Booth's brother Jared] It is nice to meet you, Jarhead. I can see the family resemblance. Your facial structure is even more symmetrical than Booth's. Jared: [to Booth, aside] Is she coming on to me? Booth: No, it's just the way she talks. Brennan: I didn't have sex with him, Cam. Angela: Didn't have sex with who? Cam: Jared Booth. Angela: Good. Brennan: Why good? Cam: Because... because... Angela: Because he's Booth's little brother, and it would just be a creepy way to have sex with a Booth without having sex with the real Booth. Cam: Kudos, Angela. I would not have had the guts to say that aloud. Cam: Dr. Brennan, I don't want you to think this is an intervention. Brennan: I don't know what that means. Sweets: An intervention is when a group of loved ones bands together to help one of their own make a difficult decisi

Bones (season 4), CC BY-SA 4.0