Quotes

Dialogue

Hilly: What do you publish? George: Oh, mostly nonfiction. Gardening, cook books, how-to-do-it books. Hilly: Like sex manuals? George: I've edited a few. Hilly: An authority, huh? George: I know what goes where...and why. Hilly: That's very interesting. Are you married? George: Divorced. Hilly: How come? George: My friends all told me that my wife was too good for me...and after a couple of years I decided they were right.

Dialogue

George: I can't get over the size of this room without the partition. They are small rooms by themselves. Hilly: They're perfect for juggling. George: For what? Hilly: For juggling. When you practice...the balls would always bounce off the walls. George: Do you juggle a lot? Hilly: I know what goes where and why. George: I like that song. If I ever hear it again...it'll be difficult not to think of you. Hilly: You put that very nicely. George: Thanks. To traveling by train. Hilly: Trains that pass in the night.

Dialogue

George: Milk her? I've never milked a cow before. Rita: Cut the gas, Steve, you're a grown man. I'm sure you've had some similar experience. [laughs] Look, you just sit down, take a tit in each hand and let nature take its course.

Dialogue

Sheriff Chauncey: Is he with the Feds? George: Who? Sheriff Chauncey: This guy Rembrandt. George: Rembrandt is dead. Sheriff Chauncey: Dead? That makes four. Listen, fella, are you sure you're not making this up as you go along? I'm an officer of the law and I got a lot better things to do than listen to that kind of funnin'. Sheriff Chauncey: That's my hotline. Now you take your time to get your facts straight 'cause when I come back I want your answers clear and to the point. Got that? And you can start with who shot Rembrandt!

Dialogue

George: What do you think? Grover: I think you better make a right up here and then a sharp left. I'm coming over. Grover: Jesus Christ, man! That's how you murdered your victims? Put 'em in a car and bounced 'em to death? George: Sorry! Grover: Sorry, my ass! You dangerous. Proves one thing, though: you don't do this for no living. George: No I don't. Grover: What are you slowing down for? George: There's a truck up ahead. Grover: So....there is a truck up ahead. Be a man! Let's turn on the siren. [George begins to accelerate and overtake the truck] Let's get them hippies off the road. Put some foot in it!! George: Would you like to drive for a while?

Dialogue

Sheriff Chauncey: Hello, Car 36, what the hell happened to you guys? Grover Muldoon: [into the radio] Hey Chauncey, this is Grover T. Muldoon. You wanna know what happened? We just whooped your ass. We whooped your ass. Ha ha ha!

Dialogue

Grover: [attempting to hotwire a Jaguar] I'm following the plan. Just changed my mind. George: Are you crazy? I thought we were gonna take the Chevy in back. Grover: Chevy? That's a jerk-off, man. This here is pure pussy. George: Pure pussy? Tell that to the judge. Grover: Don't worry about no judge, Man. This thing gonna get us to Kansas City on time. George: How about jail? Did you know that the office is right in front of us?

Dialogue

Grover: You thinking about her? George: Yeah. Crazy thing is I just met her two nights ago. Grover: That's the way love is. I always lose my memory when I fall in love.

Dialogue

[to himself, in the mirror] Come on, man, get some jive goin'. Be cool. Shake it, but don't break it. Yeah! Hey man, how do I look? You look sharp, brother. I feel sharp! You hear? I feel like the sun around midnight. You dig? Outta sight! Get down! Get down! Feelin' good! Feelin' fine! Feelin' real fine! That's it. Just loosen up those hips, sugar. All you whiteys got a tight ass. Yeah, get that ass movin' there. Outta sight! I'm a macaroni! Get down! I'm the king! Number one, baby! [Shoe Shiner enters] Um, um, I'm not...

Dialogue

Grover: Give me the gun. [George hands him the gun] Now, give me your wallet. George: What the... Grover: I gotta buy a disguise...a porter's uniform. George: You know, these disguises are getting expensive. Grover: What can I say, man? Crime costs.

Dialogue

Devereau: The Silver Streak does have its drawbacks, but please try the marmalade. They do provide an excellent cuisine. Grover: Oh, thank you, sir. I'll tell the boys in the kitchen. We aims to please. Coffee, miss? Hilly: No, thanks. Grover: He ain't bullshittin' about the cuisine. Devereau: Steward? Grover: Is that your lady, man? She's somethin' else. Devereau: Steward! Grover: Stand up, mama. Let me get a look at you. Devereau: Steward! Grover: Mm, mm, mm! Have mercy! Devereau: Steward, you may go. Grover: Just a little more coffee? Devereau: No, thank you. Grover: Half a cup? [pours coffee in Devereau's lap] Oh, sorry, sir. Look what I've done. Devereau: You... Get out of... Grover: See what I've done... Devereau: You ignorant nigger! Grover: [pulling a gun] Who you callin' nigger, huh? You don't know me well enough to call me no nigger! I'll slap the taste out your mouth! You don't even know my name! I'll whoop your ass! Beat the white off your ass! Hilly: Who are you? Grover: I

Dialogue

George Caldwell: Is there any way to get to the engine from here? Ralston: There's no way to get to the engine at all. How come we're going so fast? George Caldwell: There's nobody driving the train. Ralston: Oh, that's impossible. The train would stop. George Caldwell: Does it look like it is stopping to you? Ralston: [looks out the window] Sure in the hell don't. I'm gonna pull the emergency brake. Grover Muldoon: The emergency brakes have been cut. Ralston: [pauses] Damn hippies!

Dialogue

Grover: [driving away in a stolen car] Take it easy, killer. Stay loose. Hilly: What's he doing? George: He's crazy. Hilly: Crazy? He's got the right idea. Let's get out of here and go to a park. George: A park? Hilly: Yeah, I wanna lie back on the grass and have you teach me some more about gardening.