Quotes

Others

Shana, they bought their tickets. They knew what they were getting into. I say, let 'em crash!

Others

[when offered cream for her coffee] No thank you, I take it black…like my men.

Others

"WZAZ in Chicago where disco lives forever" (The Airplane then took out the antenna forcing the station to go off the air).

Dialogue

LA Control Tower: Flight 2-0-9'er, you are cleared for take-off. Oveur: Roger. Murdock: Huh? LA Control Tower: L.A. departure frequency: 1-2-3 point 9'er. Oveur: Roger. Murdock: Huh? Basta: Request vector, over. Oveur: What? LA Control Tower: Flight 2-0-9'er, clear for vector 2-3-4. Murdock: We have clearance, Clarence. Oveur: Roger, Roger. What's our vector, Victor?

Dialogue

Striker: The stewardess said... [before he could say that she told him the pilot needed help, he notices that only the autopilot is flying the plane] BOTH pilots?! Rumack: Can you fly this plane and land it? Striker: Surely you can't be serious. Rumack: I am serious. And don't call me Shirley.

Dialogue

Randy: Excuse me sir, there's been a little problem in the cockpit… Striker: The cockpit...what is it? Randy: It's the little room in the front of the plane where the pilots sit, but that's not important right now.

Dialogue

Oveur: You ever been in a cockpit before? Joey: No sir, I've never been up in a plane before. Oveur: You ever seen a grown man naked? Do you like movies about gladiators? Oveur: Joey, have you ever been in a Turkish prison?

Dialogue

Reporter: What kind of plane is it? Johnny: Oh, it's a big, pretty white plane with red stripes, curtains in the windows and wheels, and it looks like a big Tylenol!

Dialogue

Elaine: Doctor, Mr. Hammen ate fish, and Randy said there are five more cases, and they all had fish, too. Rumack: And the co-pilot had fish. What did the navigator have? Elaine: He had fish. Rumack: All right, now we know what we're up against. Every passenger on this plane had fish for dinner will become violently ill in the next half hour. [Oveur looks at his finished dinner plate, sees he had fish too] Elaine: Just how serious is it? Rumack: Extremely serious. It starts with a slight fever and dryness of the throat. [Oveur starts reaching for his throat] When the virus penetrates the red blood cells, the victim becomes dizzy, begins to experience an itchy rash... [Oveur starts to sway dizzily and scratching himself] ...then the poison goes to work on the central nervous system, severe muscle spasms followed by the inevitable drooling. [Oveur's right arm twitches madly, and then drools heavily] At this point, the entire digestive system collapses, accompanied by uncontrollable flatu

Dialogue

Randy: Can I get you something? Second Jive Dude: S'mo-fo butter layin' me to the bone, jackin' me up. Tight me? [subtitle: I ate something that is making my insides cramp up. Can you help me?] Randy: What did he say? First Jive Dude: Cutty say he can't hang! [subtitle: My buddy here says he can't take this for much longer!] Jive Lady: Oh, stewardess? I speak Jive. He said, he's in great pain and wants to know if you can help him. Randy: Could you tell him to just relax, and I'll be back as soon as I can with some medicine? Jive Lady: Just hang loose, blood. She gonna catch you up for the rebound on the med-side. [subtitle: Just relax, my friend. She's going to come back with medicine to make you feel better.] Second Jive Dude: What it is, big momma? My momma didn't raise no dummies, I dug her rap! [subtitle: Ma'am, I'm not stupid. I understood what she just said.] Jive Lady: Cut me some slack, Jack! [subtitle: Hey, I'm trying to help!] Jive Lady: Chump don't want no help, chump don't

Dialogue

Dr. Rumack: Captain, these passengers don't have much time. How soon can we land? Oveur: I can't tell. Dr. Rumack: You can tell me, I'm a doctor. Oveur: What I mean is, I don't know. Dr. Rumack: Well, can't you take a guess? Oveur: ...Not for another two hours. Dr. Rumack: You can't take a guess for another two hours? Oveur: No, what I'm saying is we can't land for another two hours.

Dialogue

McCroskey: Johnny, what do you make out of this? [hands Johnny a weather bulletin] Johnny: This? Why, I could make a hat, or a brooch, or a pterodactyl.

Dialogue

Joey: Wait a minute, I know you. You're Kareem Abdul-Jabbar! You play basketball for the Los Angeles Lakers! Murdock: I'm sorry, son, but you must have me confused with someone else. My name is Roger Murdock, I'm the co-pilot. Joey: You are Kareem! I've seen you play! My dad's got season tickets! Murdock: I think you should go back to your seat now, Joey. Right, Clarence? Oveur: Nah, he's not bothering anyone, let him stay here. Murdock: [shows his nametag] But just remember, my name is Roger Murdock, I'm an airline pilot. Joey: I think you're the greatest, but my dad says you don't work hard enough on defense. And he says that lots of times, you don't even run down court. And that you don't really try, except during the playoffs. Murdock: The hell I don't! [looks around to make sure no one is watching and grabs Joey by the shirt up close] Listen, kid. I've been hearing that crap ever since I was at UCLA. I'm out there busting my buns every night! Tell your old man to drag Walton and L

Dialogue

Steve: He'll never bring it down in this soup. Never! Not one chance in a million. Rex: I know. I know. But it's his ship now, his command. He's in charge, he's the boss, the head man, the top dog, the big cheese, the head honcho, number one...