That '70s Show, season 4

Alternate Eric: Ow! Alternate Kitty: Oh, oh, Jake, honey, honey. Be nice to your big brother. He's not strong like you. Eric: Brother? What the hell? Angel: Your parents finally had the son they always wanted. Alternate Red: Now, son, what do we call Eric? Jake: Dumbass! Alternate Red: There's my boy! [Red and Kitty laugh]

That '70s Show (season 4), CC BY-SA 4.0

Alternate Eric: [hears real-life version of himself, who just witnessed the alternate Eric and Donna admit their feelings] Oh, wait a minute. You actually had a relationship with Donna? Eric: Wait, I thought you said he couldn't hear me. Angel: I'm loose with the rules, so sue me. Alternate Eric: No, seriously, you had Donna? Eric: Look, we broke up. You're much better off. Alternate Eric: Says you! Look at me. I'm 28 years old! I've only had sex with Big Rhonda, and all three times, believe me, she did not look like that! [points to Alternate Big Rhonda, who has a very sexy body] Eric: Idiot. You're sad you were never with Donna? Well, you got off light, man! I had her and I lost her, and believe me, you don't wanna know how bad that hurts! [storms out of reunion hall] Alternate Eric: So, you're an angel, right? Is there any thing you can do to help me? Angel: Alright, listen closely: NO!

That '70s Show (season 4), CC BY-SA 4.0

Eric: Hey. Donna: "Hey?" Is that all you have to say to me? Eric: Well, what do you have to say to me? Donna: Huh. How about this? "Hey." Eric: I'm not wrong! Donna: You are wrong, you dill-hole! [walks off] Eric: Oh, great. That's nice. That's really mature. Double dill-hole! [to himself] Double dill-hole?!

That '70s Show (season 4), CC BY-SA 4.0

Red: There were times that I thought I would never get over her, but time passed. I moved on, and then the day came when I didn't think about her as much, then a couple more days came along when I thought of her even less. Then one day I didn't think about her at all... and then that made me sad. Eric: We've got a little Irish in us, don't we, Dad? Red: Yes, we do. Eric: It just... hurts. Red: Listen, I'm gonna give you a few days to pull yourself together. You could stay in bed, watch TV, whatever you need to do. Eric: Thank you, Dad. Not that it matters, but... Donna didn't dump me. I broke up with her. Red: Whatever you need to tell yourself to make it better.

That '70s Show (season 4), CC BY-SA 4.0

Donna: Oh, right. Paul McCartney and Wings are on tonight. [sits down] Eric: [paces around] Okay, so... Okay, we're all here now. So... So, Donna, you're staying? Donna: Okay. Eric: What I meant to say was... Look, Donna, I don't think it's cool if you hang out here. Donna: So, what, you're like, kicking me out? [pause] Wow. Okay then. Bye. Jackie: Well, if you're kicking her out, then you're kicking me out. Eric: No, Jackie no. Oh, wait. I mean, bye!

That '70s Show (season 4), CC BY-SA 4.0

Eric: And then she just comes down into the basement like it's no big deal! And after what happened? And she's just gonna act like everything's cool and everything's fine? You don't love me, you don't get my couch! Or my friends! I'm a packaged deal, baby! So I just told her, "Fire up those walking sticks, Big Red!" Because this ain't happening! I'm not having it! Hyde: [sighs] Okay, Forman... We were all there, and that ain't how it happened. Wanna talk about it some more? Eric: Mmmm... no.

That '70s Show (season 4), CC BY-SA 4.0