Matilda

Cookie: Entire confection. Amanda: My mommy thinks they're sweet. Mrs. Phelps: In that room right over there. Would you like me to pick you out one with lots of pictures in it? Hortensia: You squirts better skedaddle. I'm not kidding. The Trunchbull likes to snap a whip in there to see who's trying to hide. FBI Agent Bill: I've got 9:18. FBI Agent Bob: [into recorder] 9:17 is correct. Mickey: Are you ready to get sticky with Mickey?

Matilda (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Narrator: [first lines] Everyone is born, but not everyone is born the same. Some will grow to be butchers or bakers or candlestick makers. Some will only be really good at making a Jell-O salad. One way or another, though, every human being is unique, for better or for worse. [a nurse picks up the baby girl and shows her to a man, who grumbles and walks off] Most parents believe that their children are the most beautiful creatures ever to grace the planet. Others take a less emotional approach. Harry: What a waste of time. Zinnia: And painful. Harry: And expensive! $9.25 for a bar of soap? Zinnia: Well, I had to take a shower, Harry. Harry: $5,000?! I'm not paying it! What are they gonna do, repossess the kid? [puts the baby girl in the back of his car. Looking back at her, a boy named Michael Wormwood, Harry and Zinna's son, waves a toy, making her anxious. Harry jerks the car forward, causing the baby girl to slide. He hits the gas pedal, causing the baby girl to slide back] There's

Matilda (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Narrator: The next morning, after her parents left, Matilda set off in search of a book. Matilda: Where's are the children's books, please? Mrs. Phelps: In that room right over there. Would you like me to pick you out one with lots of pictures in it? Matilda: No, thank you. I'm sure I can manage. Narrator: From then on, every day, as soon as her mother went to bingo, Matilda walked the ten blocks to the library, and devoured one book after another. [She giggles upon reading, as Mrs. Phelps hears her whilst working. Matilda places some books on a table, before she puts them back.] When she finished all the children's books, she started wandering around in search of something else. Mrs. Phelps, who had been watching her with fascination for the past few weeks, offered Matilda some valuable library information. Mrs. Phelps: You know, you can have your very own library card, and then you could take books home, and you wouldn't have to walk here every day. You can take home as many as you'd

Matilda (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Harry: [goes into the house, smiling] I'm great! I'm incredible! Michael, pencil and paper, in the kitchen. Zinnia: Did we sell some cars today, honeydew? Harry: Did we! [kisses his wife as his son grabs a notebook and a pencil] Zinnia: [as she, her husband, and her son walk to the table where her daughter is reading her book] Does that mean I can get that new TV? Harry: Yeah! Son, one day, you're gonna have to earn your own living. And it's time that you've learned the family business. Sit down, and write this down. Harry: All right. The first car that your brilliant father sold cost $320. I sold it for $1,158. The second one costs $512. I sold it for $2,269! Michael: Wait, Dad, you're going too fast. Harry: Just write. The third cost $68. I sold it for $999! And the fourth cost $1,100. I sold it for 7,839 big American boffos! Zinnia: Harry! :[kisses her husband] Harry: What's my profit for the day? Michael: Could you repeat the last one-? Matilda: $10,265. Matilda: Check it if you do

Matilda (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Harry: Michael, come into my room! Michael: What? Harry: My boy! Today's the day I take you to the shop. What do ya say? Michael: I don't know. What do you say, Dad? Harry: I say appearance is nine-tenths of the law. People don't buy a car. They buy me. Which is why I take such good care of myself. Well-oiled hair. Clean shaved. Snappy suit. Now run along and get ready for a big day of learning, kid. And it's gonna be a big day of learning, too. There's a sucker born every minute, and we're gonna take 'em for all they've got. Michael: Give me the cookies. Zinnia: Here. Harry: OK, my boy! Heir to the throne. Today, we diddle the customer. Harry: What's wrong with you? What are you looking at? Lovekins, where's my breakfast? Zinnia: Here we are, my heartstrings. [sees her husband, shrieks, and throws two bowls of cereal in the air] Snickerdoodle, what did you do to your hair? Harry: [confused] My hair?! [goes to a mirror as Zinnia and Michael watch, he sees his hair dyed blonde. He screa

Matilda (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Harry: Give me those things! Give me that! Where are you going with those? Give me those. Get in the car! [Harry grabs the car parts] Go on. [Michael and Matilda hop in the car] Get in. Narrator: Dirty dealings, like buying stolen car parts, never stay secret for long. Especially when the FBI gets involved. FBI Agent Bob: [into recorder] 9:17, suspect exits domicile. FBI Agent Bill: I've got 9:18. FBI Agent Bob: [into recorder] 9:17 is correct.

Matilda (film), CC BY-SA 4.0