Quotes

Dialogue

Ken: [Preparing to climb the the belfry] Coming up? Ray: What's up there? Ken: The view. Ray: The view of what? The view of down here? I can see that from down here. Ken: Ray, you are about the worst tourist in the whole world. Ray: Ken, I grew up in Dublin. I love Dublin. If I'd've grown up on a farm, and was retarded, Bruges might impress me, but I didn't, so it doesn't.

Dialogue

Overweight Man: Been to the top of the tower? Ray: Yeah. Yeah, it's rubbish. Overweight Man: It is? Guide book says it's a must see. Ray: Well you lot ain't goin' up there. Overweight Man: Pardon me? Why? Ray: I mean it's all windy stairs. I'm not being funny. Overweight Man: What exactly are you trying to say? Ray: What exactly am I trying to say? You's are a bunch of fuckin' elephants!

Dialogue

Ken: We are doing what I want to do, got it? Ray: Of course, which I presume will involve culture. Ken: Oh, we shall strike a balance between culture and fun. Ray: Somehow I believe, Ken, that the balance shall tip in the favour of culture, like a big fat fucking retarded fucking black girl on a see-saw opposite... a dwarf.

Dialogue

Ken: [Looking at a surreal Bosch painting] It's Judgment Day, you know? Ray: Oh, yeah. What's that then? Ken: Well, it's, you know, the final day on Earth, when mankind will be judged for all the crimes they've committed and that. Ray: Oh. And see who gets into Heaven and who gets into Hell and all that. Ken: Yeah. Ray: What's the other place? Ken: Purgatory. Ray: Purgatory... Purgatory's kind of like the in-betweeny one. You weren't really shit, but you weren't all that great either. Like Tottenham. [Pause] Do you believe in all that stuff, Ken? Ken: In Tottenham?

Dialogue

Ken: Well, technically, your bare hands can kill somebody too, they can be deadly weapons too. I mean, what if he knew karate, say? Ray: You said he was a lollipop man! Ken: He was a lollipop man. Ray: What's a lollipop man doing knowing fucking karate? Ken: I'm just saying. Ray: How old was he? Ken: About fifty. Ray: What's a fifty-year old lollipop man doing knowing fucking karate! What was he, a Chinese lollipop man? Jesus, Ken. I'm trying to talk about... Ken: I know what you're trying to talk about. Ray: I killed a little boy. You keep bringing up a fucking lollipop man. Ken: You didn't mean to kill a little boy. Ray: I know I didn't mean to... but because of the choices I made, and the course that I put into action, that little boy isn't here anymore, and he'll never be here again. [Pause] I mean here in the world, not here in Belgium. Well he'll never be here in Belgium either, will he? I mean, he might've wanted to come here when he got older. Don't know why. And that's all bec

Dialogue

Chloë: This movie, I think it's going to be a very good one. There's never been a classic movie made in Bruges until now. Ray: Of course there hasn't. It's a shithole. Chloë: Bruges is my home town, Ray. Ray: Well, it's still a shithole. Chloë: It's not a shithole! Ray: What? Even midgets have to take drugs to stick it. Chloë: Okay. So, we've insulted my home town. You're doing very well, Raymond. Why don't you tell me some Belgium jokes while you're at it? Ray: Don't know any Belgium jokes, and if I did I think I'd have the good sense not to... hang on. Is Belgium where there's all those child abuse murders lately? Then I do know a Belgium joke. What's Belgium famous for? Chocolates and child abuse, and they only invented the chocolates to get to the kids. [Sees Chloë's shocked expression] What? Chloë: One of the girls they murdered was a friend of mine. Ray: [After a long pause, feeling bad] I'm sorry, Chloë. Chloë: One of the girls they murdered wasn't a friend of mine. I just wante

Dialogue

Ray: I don't hit women. I would never hit a woman, Chloë! I'd hit a woman who was trying to hit me with a bottle! That's different, that's self defense, isn't it? Or a woman who could do karate. I'd never hit a woman generally, Chloë. Don't think that. God, you're pretty. Chloë: I have to make a call. Ray: Oh no. You've gone off me, haven't you? Just cause I hit that fucking cow.

Dialogue

Ken: How did your date go? Ray: My date involved two instances of extreme violence, one instance of her hand on my cock and my finger up her thing, which lasted all too briefly - isn't that always the way? - one instance of me stealing 5 grams of a very high quality cocaine and one instance of me blinding a poofy little skinhead, so, all in all, my evening pretty well balanced out. Fine. Ken: You've got five grams of coke? Ray: [Shakes head] I got four grams on me and one gram in me which is why me heart is going like the fucking clappers as if I'm about to have a heart attack, so if I collapse any minute now please remember to tell the doctors it might have something to do with the coke.

Dialogue

Ken: Your girlfriend's very pretty. Jimmy: She ain't my girlfriend. She's a prostitute I just picked up. Ken: I wasn't aware there were any prostitutes in Bruges. Jimmy: You just have to look in the right places... brothels are good. Ken: Well, you've picked up a very pretty prostitute. Jimmy: Thank you. Ken: You from the States? Jimmy: Yeah. But don't hold it against me. Ken: I'll try not to... just try not to say anything too loud or crass.

Dialogue

Yuri: There are a lot of alcoves in the Koningin Astridpark. You use this word, alcoves? Ken: Alcoves? Yes. Sometimes. Yuri: There are not many people around in these alcoves in Christmas time. If I were to murder a man, I would murder him here. (beat) Are you sure this is the right word, alcoves? Ken: Alcoves, yes! It's kind of like, nooks and crannies. Yuri: Nooks and crannies, yes! Perhaps this would be more accurate. Nooks and crannies rather than alcoves. Yeah! You are going to do it, aren't you? Mr. Waters would be very disappointed. Ken: Of course I'm going to fucking do it. It's what I do.

Dialogue

Ken: [Walks up behind Ray sitting on a park bench who holds up gun to head] Ray, don't! Ray: Fuckin' hell! Where the fuck did you come from? Ken: I've behind a thing. What the fuck you doing, Ray? Ray: What the fuck are you doing? Ken: Nothin'. Ray: Oh, my God... you were gonna kill me. Ken: No, I wa - You were gonna kill yourself! Ray: Well... I'm allowed. Ken: No, you're not! Ray: What? I'm not allowed, and you are? How's that fair?

Dialogue

Ray: Mine's a bloody girl's gun. Ken: I'm keeping it. Ray: Pardon me? Gimme me gun back. Ken: You're not getting it back. You're a suicide case. Ray: And you were trying to shoot me in the fucking head. Ken: You're not getting that gun back. Ray: Oh, great day this has turned out to be. I'm suicidal, me mate tries to kill me, me gun gets nicked and we're still in fucking Bruges. Ken: Listen, I'm gonna give you some money and put you on a train somewhere. Ray: Back to England? Ken: You can't go back to England, Ray. You'd be a dead man! Ray: [Sobs] Ken, I wanna be a dead man. Have you been missing somethin'? Ken: You don't wanna a dead man, Ray. Ray: I killed a little boy! [Sobs] Ken: Then save the next little boy. Just go away somewhere, get out of this business and try to do something good. You're not gonna help anybody dead. You're not gonna bring that boy back, but you might save the next one. Ray: What am I gonna be, a doctor? You need exams. Ray: Do anything, Ray. Do anything!

Dialogue

Ray: What a wanker! Ken: He said this whole trip... this whole being in Bruges thing, was just to give you one last, joyful memory before you died. Ray: In Bruges? [Laughs] The Bahamas, maybe? Why fucking Bruges? Ken: I suppose it's cheaper.

Dialogue

Ray: The rest of the acid and the ecstasy. Can I have me gun back, please? What am I gonna do, Ken? What am I gonna do? Ken: Just keep moving. Keep on moving. Try not to think about it. Learn a new language, maybe? Ray: Sure, I can hardly do English. That's one thing I like about Europe, though. You don't have to learn any of their languages. Ken: Just forget about home for a while. See how the land lies in six years, seven years. Seven years is not that long. Ray: It's longer than that boy got. My first fucking job. Great hitman I turned out to be. Ken: Some people just aren't cut out for it, Ray. Ray: Are you? When are you going back to England? Ken: I'll head back in a couple of hours or something. Ray: Harry's not gonna be mad at you, is he? For letting me go? Ken: I'll sort out Harry. Ray: Just tell him I'll have probably killed myself in a fortnight, anyway. Ken: You won't, will you, Ray?

Dialogue

Ken: [Makes call] Harry? It's Ken. Listen to this noise. Do you know what that is? Yeah, I know you know it's a train. Do you know what train? Well, it's a train that Ray just got on, and he's alive and he's well, and he doesn't know where he's going and neither do I. So if you need to do your worst, do your worst. You've got the address of the hotel. I'll be here waiting. Because I've got to quite like Bruges now. It's like a fucking fairytale or something. [Ken hangs up] Natalie: [Appears in doorway] Harry. Harry! Harry: [Stops] What! Natalie: It's an inanimate fucking object! Harry: You're an inanimate fucking object!

Dialogue

Harry: [To his two daughters and son] Now, you lot be good for your mummy and Imamoto, okay? 'Cause Daddy's got to go away for a few days. Natalie: Where are you going? Harry: I've got to go to Bruges. Natalie: Bruges? Where's that? Harry: It's in Belgium. Natalie: Why would anybody have to go to Belgium? Harry: 'Cause I've got to sort something out. Natalie: Is it something to do with the phone? Harry: It's something to do with Ken. It's a matter of honour. Natalie: Well, it ain't gonna be dangerous, is it? Harry: Well, of course it's gonna be dangerous if it's a matter of fucking honour! Natalie: You are bringing the fellas with you? Tell me you're bringing the fellas with you. [Harry shakes his head] Harry. Harry: I'm sorry for calling you an inanimate object. I was upset.

Dialogue

Harry: [To Eirik, with his eyepatch] Aye-aye! Yuri: [Referring to selection of firearms laid out on table] Take your pick, Mr. Waters. Harry: An UZI? Ha, I'm not from South Central Los fucking Angeles. I didn't come here to shoot twenty black ten-year olds in a fucking drive-by. I want a normal gun for a normal person. Yuri: I knew he wouldn't kill the guy. I could see it in his eyes when I was telling him about the alcoves. Harry: ...about the what? Yuri: The alcoves - the alcoves in the Koningin Astridpark. Oh, I also have some dumdums. You use this word, "dumdums"? The bullets that make the head explode? Harry: "Dumdums", yeah. Yuri: Would you like some of these dumdums? Harry: Well, I know I shouldn't, err... But I will. Eirik: Motherfucker. Harry: Is he talking to me? Yuri: No, Eirik's on your side, Mr. Waters. Your young friend blinded him last night. Harry: Ray did? Eirik: I was trying to rob him. And he took my gun from me. And the gun was full of blanks. And he shot a blank in

Dialogue

Harry: Well? Ken: The boy's suicidal Harry. He's a walking dead man. Keeps going on about Hell and Purgatory - Harry: When I phoned you yesterday, did I ask you 'Ken, would you do me a favor and become Ray's psychiatrist please?' No. What I think what I asked you was "would you go blow his fucking head off for me?" "He's suicidal"? I'm suicidal, you're suicidal, everybody's fucking suicidal. We don't all keep going on about it. Has he killed himself yet? So he's not fucking suicidal, is he? Ken: He put a loaded gun to his head this morning, I stopped him. Harry: He... What? This gets fucking worse! Ken: We were down the park... Harry: Lemme get this right..."You were down the park"? What's that got to do with fucking anything? Let me get this right. Not only have you refused to kill the boy, you even stopped the boy from killing himself, which would've solved my problem, which would've solved your problem, which sounds like would've solved the boy's problem. Ken: It wouldn't have solve

Dialogue

Marie: Why don't you both put your guns down, go home? Harry: Don't be stupid; this is the shootout.