The L Word

[holding a specimen cup of sperm] God, it's repugnant, I can't believe I used to swallow that stuff.

The L Word, CC BY-SA 4.0

Dr. Wilson: All right, I'm going to take a look at this and while I'm gone, well, you remember how I told you that there's a fair amount of evidence now? It's more likely to take if you're aroused. Bette: [laughs] She's not serious! Am I supposed to fuck you right here? Tina: I think it would help.

The L Word, CC BY-SA 4.0

Dana: When are you going to make up your mind between dick and pussy? And please spare us the gory bisexual details. Alice: Well, for your information, Dana, I am looking for the same qualities in a man as I am in a woman. Dana: [to Tina, gesturing] Big tits.

The L Word, CC BY-SA 4.0

Shane: It has nothing to do with you guys. You know, it's the... it's the new male. Dana: What? What do you know about men, I mean, you've never even been with a man. Shane: Well, the new male is more spiritual than the old male. He sees his sperm as an extension of his inner being, whereas the old male shot into any female without thinking about what would happen. The new male totally cares what becomes of his seed. Alice: Oh, my God, it's Yoda. Dana: Yeah, they teach that at hairdresser school, by the way. Bette: Well that's great. Why do they have to go all sensitive on us just when we need them to keep on being the same old assholes.

The L Word, CC BY-SA 4.0

Dana: I don't get it. I mean, what does Shane have that I don't have? Tina: It has to do with her attitude. Dana: I've got attitude! Marina: It's because she's so withholding. Tina: No, it's because she's so confident. Dana: No, it's because she's so STUPID and stupid people are too dumb to be insecure. Alice: [firmly] Dana, she's your friend. Tina: It's confidence okay? I'm telling you... it's because of her nipples. Dana: What do you mean it's because of her nipples? Tina: She has the best nipples in town and she knows it. Alice: Oh my God. You're so right. She has nipple confidence! Tina: Yeah, they're small and they're perfectly formed. Alice: I wonder if I could sell a story on L.A's best nipples.

The L Word, CC BY-SA 4.0

Alice: [seeing Tim] Do you guys think he knows? Bette: Knows what? Alice: [about Jenny] That his girlfriend is making the team with Marina.

The L Word, CC BY-SA 4.0