The Magic Christian

[voiceover, as a $10 note appears onscreen] Ladies and gentlemen, this is what is commonly known as money. It comes in all sizes, colours, and denominations — like people. We'll be using quite a bit of it in the next two hours... luckily, I have enough for ALL of us.

The Magic Christian (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Hamlet: [Laurence Harvey, onstage] "To be..." Youngman: [loud enough to be heard, turning to Sir Guy] I've seen it. Hamlet: "Or not to be... that is the question." Youngman: Shakespeare, right? Guy: [whispers, eyes toward the stage] Right, and double right.

The Magic Christian (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Ginger: Ah! My Second World War Nazi atrocity book came at last. [turns to Youngman, dog in her lap, and browses the book] Ginger: Do you know what Bitsy and I do? We sit down and imagine all those atrocities being done to sex criminals. - Yes, sex criminals and the like. And that Dr. Thorndike! Guy: [overhearing] What's that, Ginge? Bill Thorndike a sexy criminal? Ginger: The man you sent me to. He behaved VERY strangely.

The Magic Christian (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Youngman: You're certainly putting everybody on today, Dad. Guy: Well, you know, Youngman. Sometimes it's not enough merely to teach. One has to punish as well. A little bit of the old pause. Youngman: Cause for pause? Guy: Yes.

The Magic Christian (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Youngman: Dad, do you think words corrupt? Guy: I don't know, let's try. Agnes? Agnes: [looks up from the television] Yes? Guy: Nipple. Agnes: Shh! [turns back to the television] Guy: [watches her for a moment] Well, there's no immediate physical change.

The Magic Christian (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Traffic warden #27: What's your game, Mister? Guy: [riffling a wad of bills under the warden's nose, to persuade him to eat a parking ticket] Grand is the name, and, uh - money is the game. Would you care to play?

The Magic Christian (film), CC BY-SA 4.0