Notting Hill

Max: [Opens door.] Hi. Honey: Hi. [Shows off her dress.] Max: Ah yes, Happy Birthday. Honey: Thank you. Max: Look, your brother's brought this girl ... Honey: Hi guys! [Walks into the house and turns a corner.] Oh, holy fuck! William: Hon, this is Anna. Anna, this is Honey. She is my baby sister. Anna: Oh, hi. Honey: Oh God! This is one of those key moments in life when it's possible you can be really genuinely cool and I ... I'm going to fail just a 100%. I ... I absolutely, totally, and utterly adore you, and I just think ... you are the most beautiful woman in the world. And more importantly, I genuinely believe, and I've believed for some time now, that ... that we could be best friends. So what do you think? Anna: Oh ... ha ha, uh, lucky me! [Offers present.] Um ah well, Happy Birthday. Honey: Oh, you gave me a present. We're best friends already then. ... Marry Will! He's a really nice guy. Then we can be sisters. Anna: Well, I'll think about it.

Notting Hill, CC BY-SA 4.0

Max: You haven't slept with her, have you? William: That is a cheap question and the answer is, of course, no comment. Max: "No comment" means "yes." William: No, it doesn't. Max: Do you ever masturbate? William: DEFINITELY no comment. Max: You see? It means "yes."

Notting Hill, CC BY-SA 4.0

Anna: Wait, what about me? Max: Sorry, you think you deserve the brownie? Anna: Well, a shot at it, at least, huh? William: Well, you'll have to fight me for it- this is a very good brownie. Anna: I've been on a diet every day since I was nineteen, which basically means I've been hungry for a decade. I've had a series of not-nice boyfriends, one of whom hit me. Ah, and every time I get my heart broken, the newspapers splash it about as though it's entertainment. And it's taken two rather painful operations to get me looking like this. Honey: Really? Anna: Really. [indicates chin and nose] And, one day, not long from now, my looks will go, they'll discover I can't act and I'll become some sad, middle-aged woman who looks a bit like someone who was famous for a while. Max: [long pause] Nah, nice try, gorgeous, but you don't fool anyone. [all laugh] William: Pathetic effort to hog the brownie.

Notting Hill, CC BY-SA 4.0

William: [slipping while trying to climb a fence] Whoopsidaisies! Anna: What did you say? William: Nothing. Anna: Yes you did. William: No I didn't. Anna: You said "whoopsidaisies". William: I don't think so. No one says "whoopsidaisies" do they? Unless they're... Anna: There is no "unless." No one has said "whoopsidaisies" for fifty years and even then it was only just little girls with blonde ringlets. William: Exactly. Right, here we go again. [he falls off the fence again] Whoopsidaisies. It's a disease I've got. It's a clinical thing. I'm taking pills and having injections. I'm told it won't last long. William: [after hitting his shin on a fence while climbing over it] Now what in the world in this garden could make that ordeal worthwhile? William: Nice garden.

Notting Hill, CC BY-SA 4.0

William: [leaving the restaurant after challenging the loud guys] I'm sorry. Anna: No, I love that you tried. Time was I'd have done the same thing. In fact...[turns back and walks up to the loud table] Hi. Loud Man in Restaurant: Oh. My. God. Anna: I just wanted to apologize for my friend - he's very sensitive. Loud Man in Restaurant: No, I mean... Anna: No, leave it. I'm sure you didn't mean any harm, I'm sure it was just friendly banter, I'm sure you guys have dicks the size of peanuts. Enjoy your dinner, the tuna's really good.

Notting Hill, CC BY-SA 4.0

William: There's this girl... Spike: Aha, see I've been getting a female vibe. Good. Speak on, dear friend. William: Ah, see she's someone who can't be mine. And, uh it's as if I've taken love heroin and now I can't ever have it again. I've opened Pandora's box and there's trouble inside. Spike: [pause] Yeah. Tricky. I knew a girl at school called Pandora...never got to see her box though. [laughs] William: Right. Well thanks, that's very helpful.

Notting Hill, CC BY-SA 4.0