The Catherine Tate Show

Did you see Beyonce last night on the television? Beyonce is well bing bing. Am I bovvered? Am I bovvered though? I ain't even bovvered! Don't tell me what to do, are you telling me what to do? Are you disrespecting me? Are you stupid? Why don't you shut up though? Shut up, then. I don't care though, I ain't bovvered!

The Catherine Tate Show, CC BY-SA 4.0

Terry your husband? Ahh! Jesus Christ!!! What the hell have you done in here? You know what they say about a man who likes a bit of chrome in his kitchen, likes a bit of cock up his arse! Do you dream about it? No kids, drives a big black Cherokee Jeep, likes chrome, not to mention the cheap aftershave and cropped hair. YOU BIG OLE' BENDER!

The Catherine Tate Show, CC BY-SA 4.0

What a load of ole' shit! Everything's a pound? That ain't bad is it, that's quite reasonable. I don't know where I'd put it all, but I'd take it all off your hands for a pound. Oh, fuckin' chill out!

The Catherine Tate Show, CC BY-SA 4.0

You know what you could do, you could just get out of your car and say No! No! NO!!! I SAID NO!!! and then get the pail of water and fling it over his greasy, flea ridden head and he'll be like "Ow, that's hot, Ow! Ow, that's hot!" and then just give him a backhander, One swift backhander right across his red, steaming face. Hitler worshipping pikey scum!

The Catherine Tate Show, CC BY-SA 4.0

Aga Saga Woman: Darling, what are you doing? What did mummy tell you? Not with a wooden spoon, you'll bruise the dough. Thomas, Chloe, I've got some bad news, daddy hasn't been able to find any good brie on this trip. Thomas: What about that Wensleydale left over from Ginnie's christening? Aga Saga Woman: Don't be silly, it's a Parisian picnic, do you want the other children to laugh at you?

The Catherine Tate Show, CC BY-SA 4.0

There's nothing wrong with these people, look at that one in the running suit. Years ago, you had to be spewing up your guts to see a doctor. Yes, it is an emergency! Me head's hangin' off! What a fuckin' liberty! She's got 'eadache! They want shootin' they really do. Well, it's too late now, love! It's too fucking late.co.uk! Emergencies only? What a load of ole' shit!!!

The Catherine Tate Show, CC BY-SA 4.0