Quotes

Dialogue

[opening lines] Y'know, there's been a heap o' legends and tall tales about Robin Hood. All different, too. Well, we folks in the animal kingdom have our own version. It's the story of what really happened in Sherwood Forest...

Dialogue

Little John: You know somethin', Robin? I was just wonderin' - are we good guys or bad guys? You know, I mean, uh... our robbin' the rich to feed the poor. Robin Hood: "Rob"?! Tsk, tsk, tsk! That’s a naughty word! We never rob. We just… sort of borrow a bit from those who can afford it. Little John: Borrow! Huh! Boy, are we in debt. Robin Hood: That sounds like another collection day for the poor. Eh, Johnny boy? Little John: Yeah. Sweet charity.

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Prince John: One more hiss out of you, eh, er, uh, Hiss, and you are walking to Nottingham. Hiss: [mutters] Snakes don't walk, they slither. Hmph. So there.

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Little John: Aw, how about that for luck? It's only a circus! A peanut operation! Robin Hood: Peanuts? Why, you dunce, that's the royal coach! It's Prince John himself! Little John: The prince? Wait a minute, there's a law against robbing royalty. I'll catch you later. Robin Hood: What? And miss this chance to perform before royalty? Little John: [groan] Well... here we go again...

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Robin Hood: [dressed as gypsy] Oo-de-lally! Oo-de-lally! Fortune tellers! Little John: [also dressed as gypsy] Fortunes forecast, lucky charms! Robin Hood: Catch the dope, with your horoscope! Prince John: Fortune tellers, how droll. Stop the coach! Hiss: Sssire, sire, they may be bandits. Prince John: Oh, poppycock! Female bandits? What next? Rubbish. [to Robin Hood and Little John] My dear ladies, you have my permission to kiss the royal hands, whichever you like... first. Robin Hood: Oh, how gracious - [kisses hand and removes large ring] - and generous. Prince John: Stop! [laughs] Stop hissing in my ear! Hiss: [hisses in Prince John's ear again; stamering] Did you see-? D-D-D-Did you see-?! Prince John: AH! [laughs] Hiss! Oh, you've hissed your last... [ties Hiss into a knot] hiss.

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Prince John: [snivelling] No, no, no, no! Hiss: I knew it. I knew it. I just knew this would happen. I tried to warn you, but no, no, no, you wouldn't listen, you just had to-- [Prince John raises his mirror in anger] Ah, ah, ah! Seven years' bad...[the prince hits him, smashing the mirror] luck. That's what it is. Besides, you broke your mother's mirror. Prince John: [screams] AAAAAAAAAH! Mommy! [sucks thumb] I've got a dirty thumb.

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Mother Rabbit: Oh, you have made his birthday a wonderful one. How can I ever thank you? Robin Hood: I only wish I could do more. [hands her a small bag of gold] Here. And keep your chin up. Soon there'll be happiness in Nottingham again, you'll see.

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Skippy: Did I hurt ya? Huh? Lady Kluck: [whispering, breaking character] No. Now, this is the part where you drag your lady fair off to Sherwood Forest. Skippy: [pulling Marian away] Come on, fair lady, let's go! Maid Marian: Oh, Robin, you're so brave and impetuous! [they sit down among the bushes] Oh... so this is Sherwood Forest? Skippy: Yeah, I guess so. Well, now what are we gonna do? Maid Marian: Well, usually, the hero gives his fair lady a kiss. Skippy: A kiss? Oh, that's sissy stuff. Maid Marian: Well, if you won't... then I will! [giggles and pulls him close, kissing him on the cheek] Sis: [to Tagalong and Toby Turtle] They're KISSING! [they all fall about laughing as Skippy wipes his cheek and scowls at them]

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Friar Tuck: Oh, for heaven's sake, son! You're no outlaw! Why, someday you'll be called a great hero! Robin Hood: A hero? You hear that, Johnny? We've just been pardoned! Little John: That's a gas, we ain't even been arrested yet! Friar Tuck: All right, laugh, you two rogues, but there's gonna be a big to-do in Nottingham. [tastes their overcooked chow, coughing up smoke rings] Well-done, ain't it? Old Prince John's having a [coughs] championship archery tournament [coughs] tomorrow. Little John: Archery tournament? Old Rob could win that standin' on his head, huh, Rob? Robin Hood: Thank you, Little John, but I'm sure we're not invited. Friar Tuck: No, but there's somebody who'll be very disappointed if you don't come... Little John: [chuckles] Yeah. Old Bushel-Britches, the "Honourable" Sheriff of Nottingham. Friar Tuck: No - Maid Marian! Robin Hood: Maid Marian? Friar Tuck: Yeah. She-She's gonna give a kiss to the winner! [chuckles] Robin Hood: [excited] A kiss to the winner! Oo-de-l

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Hiss: And you... who might you be, sssir? Little John: I am Sir Reginald, Duke of Chutney. [stuffs Hiss' hat over his mouth] And don't stick your tongue out at me, kid. [to the Prince] And now, Your Mightiness, allow me to lay some protocol on you. [stoops to kiss Prince John's hand] Prince John: No, no, no, forgive me, but I lose more jewels that way. Please sit down. Little John: [sits on Hiss] Thanks, PJ, you can't get a better seat than this, could you? The royal box...hey...what...? [pulling out Hiss] Oh, uh, excuse me, Buster. Hiss: Buster?! You, sir, have taken my seat! Prince John: [laughs] Hiss, with you around, who needs a court jester? [laughs again] Now get out there and keep your snake eyes open for you-know-who. Hiss: [humiliated] You... you mean, I... I'm being dismissed?! Little John: You heard His Mightiness! Move it, creepy, get lost! Begone, long one! Hiss: [slithering away crossly] What cheek! "Creepy"? "Buster"? "Long one"?! Who does that dopey duke think he is?

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Prince John: [looking nervous] STOOOP! Executioner, stop! Hold your axe! Little John: [holding a dagger to his back] Okay, bigshot. Now tell 'em to untie my buddy, or I'll... Prince John: [flinches] Sheriff, release my buddy! [flinches again] I mean, release the prisoner! Lady Kluck: You heard what he said, Bushel-Britches! Prince John: Sheriff, I make the rules! And since I'm head man-- [flinches again, mutters back at Little John] Not so hard, you mean thing... LET HIM GO, FOR HEAVEN'S SAKES! LET HIM GO!

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Robin Hood: And for our honeymoon? England? Maid Marian: Yes! Robin Hood: Normandy? Maid Marian: Yes! Robin Hood: Sunny Spain? Maid Marian: Oh, why not?

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Lady Cluck: Down with that scurrrrvy Prince John! Little John: Yeah!!! [sings] Oh, the world will sing Friar Tuck: A pox on the Phony King of England! Little John: He stands alone

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While he taxes us to pieces and he robs us of our bread

Dialogue

Friar Tuck: [horrified] Now, just a minute, Sheriff! Th-th-th-that's the Poor Box! Sheriff: It sure is, and I'll take it for poor Prince John. [chuckles] Every little bit helps. Female Church Mouse: Ooh, you put that back! Sheriff: And His Majesty also blesses you, little sister. Friar Tuck: You thieving scoundrel! Sheriff: Now, take it easy, Friar, I'm just doing my duty. Friar Tuck: Collecting taxes for that arrogant, greedy, ruthless, no-good Prince John?! Sheriff: [starting to lose patience] Listen, Friar. You're mighty preachy, and you're gonna preach your neck right into a hangman's noose. Friar Tuck: GET OUTTA MY CHURCH! [shoving the Sheriff out of the church] Out! Out! Out! Out! Friar Tuck: You want taxes?! I'll give you taxes! Male Church Mouse: Give it to him! Give it to him! Give it to him, Friar! Sheriff: You're under arrest for high treason to the Crown!

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Hiss: Ahem. Sire, if I may...may venture an opinion, you're not your usual, cheerful, genial self today. [Prince John blinks his narrowed eyes, ignores him and continues scowling] I...I..I know! You haven't counted your money in days. Hmm? It always makes you so happy. [Prince John is still scowling, Hiss plays with the coins] Ahem. Sire...taxes are pouring in, the jails are full, and... Oh! I have good news, sire - Friar Tuck is in jail! Prince John: [finally exploding furiously and throwing money everywhere] FRIAR TUCK?! IT'S ROBIN HOOD I WANT, YOU IDIOT! Oh, I would give all my gold if I could just get my hands on-- [pauses, turning to Hiss, his scowl turning to a mischievous grin] Did you say Friar Tuck? Hiss: Did I? Y-y-yes, I did. Prince John: Ah! Hiss, I have it! I'll use that fat friar as bait to trap Robin Hood! Hiss: Another trap? Prince John: Yes, yes, you stupid serpent! Friar Tuck will be led to the gallows in the village square, don't you see? Hiss: [shocked] B-B-But sire

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Nutsy: ONE O'CLOCK, AND ALL'S WELL! Sheriff: [waking up] Nutsy, you better set your brains ahead a couple of hours. Nutsy: Yes, sir. Uh... does that, uh, mean addin' or subtractin'? Sheriff: Oh, let's forget it. Nutsy: Yes, sir, Sheriff, sir! [salutes and walks away] Sheriff: Nutsy, how can I sleep with you yelling "ALL'S WELL" all the time here? Trigger: Sheriff, everything ain't "all's well". I got a feeling in my bones there's gonna be a jailbreak any minute-- Sheriff: [pushing his crossbow aside] Criminently, Trigger! Point that peashooter the other way! Trigger: Don't you worry none, Sheriff. [patting it] The safety's on old Betsy-- Sheriff: What in tarnation you tryin' to do, you birdbrain?! [bops Trigger on the head] Trigger: Just doin' my duty, Sheriff! Sheriff: Oh, you and that itchy trigger finger of yours...

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Sheriff: Wait a minute. Is the safety on old Betsy? Trigger: [patting his crossbow again] You bet it is, Sheriff. Sheriff: That's what I'm afraid of. You go first.

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Prince John: Oh, no. It's so miserably unfair! Hiss: Well, I tried to tell you, but no, no, no, you wouldn't listen. Your traps just never work. [Fire consumes the castle] And now look what you've done to your mother's castle! Prince John: AAAAAGH! Mommy! [sucks his thumb, becomes angry, and begins to swat at Hiss and chase him still sucking his thumb] Ohh! Hold still, you cowardly cobra! Hiss: [dodging his blows] Aah! Ooh! Sire, no! Please! Oh, no! Prince John: Procrastinating python! [screams through his sucking thumb] Ooooh! Aggravating asp! Hiss: Save me! Ooh! Prince John: You eel in snake's clothing! Hiss: Help! He's gone stark raving MAD! [echoing]