Quotes

Dialogue

Victoria: Oh, Hildegarde...what if Victor and I... [gasps] I don't like each other? Maudeline: Humph! As if that has anything to do with marriage. Do you suppose your father and I like each other? Victoria: Surely you must, a little? Maudeline and Finis: [look at each other in disgust] Of course not! Maudeline: Get those corsets laced properly. I can hear you speak without gasping.

Dialogue

Emily: You lied to me! Just to get back to that other woman. Victor: Don't you understand? You're the other woman. Emily: No! You're married to me. She's the other woman! [starts crying] Elder Gutknecht: [clears throat] She's got a point. Emily: And I thought...I thought this was going all so well! [continues crying, one of her eyes fall out]

Dialogue

Town Crier: VICTOR VAN DORT ELOPES WITH CORPSE! HEARTBROKEN BRIDE TO WED WEALTHY NEWCOMER! Nell Van Dort: Wealthy newcomer? It cannot be! William Van Dort: Did he say "corpse"? Nell Van Dort: Oh, don't be ridiculous. What corpse would marry our Victor?

Dialogue

Maudeline: [as the dead ran rampant] They must be from your side of the family! Finis: Certainly not! If my Grandfather Everglot could see this, he'd be turning in his grave! Grandfather: [booming] Finis! [they turn to see a skeleton who looks just like the portrait of Finis's grandfather, who says politely] Where do you keep the spirits? [shaking his goblet gently]

Dialogue

Pastor Galswells: [yelling] Begone, ye demons from Hell! Back to the void from whence you came! You shall not enter here! Back! Back! Skeleton: Keep it down, we're in a church.

Dialogue

Emily: [recognizes Barkis] You. Lord Barkis: Emily?! Emily: YOU! Lord Barkis: But...I left you. Emily: For dead.

Dialogue

Lord Barkis: Touche, my dear. Emily: [glares at him] Get out. Lord Barkis: Oh, I'm leaving. [laughs evilly, then picks up the Wine of Ages] But first, a toast to Emily. Always the bridesmaid, never the bride. Tell me, my dear, can a heart still break once it's stopped beating? Hmm? [laughs evilly one last time] Maggot: Let me at him! Let me at him! [Elder Gutknecht holds him back with his finger] No, don't-don't hold me back! Elder Gutknecht: [to angry corpses] Wait! We must abide by their rules! We are amongst the living. Lord Barkis: Well said. [drinks the Wine of Ages and dies] Maggot: [amusing smile] Not anymore! Elder Gutknecht: Yup, you're right. He's all yours. Mrs. Plum: New arrival. [closes the door]