Quotes

Dialogue

Chorus: [referring to Oedipus] Look, here's a man who killed his father and slept with his mother. Jocasta: I hate to tell you what they call my son in Harlem.

Dialogue

Chorus Leader: Don't go any further. I know what you're thinking, Lenny, and forget it! Lenny: I can't forget it. The thought's been put in my head. Chorus: Oh, cursed fate. Certain thoughts are better left unthunk.

Dialogue

Linda: My father's brother was supposed to be a genius. I never met him, but everybody said he was brilliant. Lenny: Really? What did he do? Linda: He was a serial rapist. He spent his whole life in jail, but if he had gone straight, he might have been very good in math.

Dialogue

Cassandra: Now I see big trouble! Lenny: Oh for God's sakes, you're such a Cassandra!

Dialogue

Lenny: Who's Rickey? Linda: He's, he's... he takes a percentage of my work. Lenny: He's a pimp, right? Linda: No, he's like a business representative. Lenny: Wha...? What do you need a business representative...? All you need is a mattress and a couple of garter belts...you're not a conglomerate!

Dialogue

Lenny: You didn't see Schindler's List? Kevin: No, no. That was the one with the Jews and the, um... who were the bad guys? Lenny: The Nazis. The blond guys were the Nazis. Kevin: They were tough motherfuckers.

Dialogue

Linda: But seriously, you wanna know why I liked you right from the start? Lenny: Why? Linda: 'Cause I'm always attracted to losers. Lenny: Losers. You think I'm a loser? Linda: Yeah, you've got no confidence. It's sweet. I like that in a man. I can't stand those johns who come in and throw down a couple of hundred and whip out a big dick and wave it all over the joint. Lenny: I wouldn't do that even if I wanted to.

Dialogue

Linda: You're married, aren't you? Lenny: How can you tell that? Linda: 'Cause you got that look. Lenny: "That look?" What... what look is that? Linda: That look like it's been a long time since you had a great blowjob.

Dialogue

Chorus: Oh my God, it's more serious than we thought! Chorus Leader: It's very serious! Her marriage to Lenny is in crisis! Chorus: With the passage of time, even the strongest bonds become fragile! Chorus Leader: Great, fellas, it sounds like a fortune cookie! Chorus: Oh, Zeus, most potent of gods! We implore thee! We need your help! Zeus, great Zeus! Hear us, hear us! We call out to thee! Zeus: Um, this is Zeus. I'm not home right now, but you can leave a message and I'll get back to you. Please start speaking at the tone. [beep] Chorus: Call us when you get in. We need help!

Dialogue

Lenny: I told you from day one, the girl was not a virgin! Kevin: You didn't tell me how many times though!