Birdman

Riggan: [as Birdman] How did we end up here? This place is horrible... Smells like balls. We don't belong in this shithole. [Riggan's video message on his computer goes off, breaking his trance] ...Shit. [answers the call] Hey, Sam. Hi, hon. Sam: Dad, what kind of... [turns to yell at flower shop employee] SHUT UP! [to Riggan] ...What kind of flowers did you say you wanted? Riggan: Alchemillas, or something that smells nice. You know, something soothing. Listen, I can't... Sam: It all smells like fucking kimchi! Riggan: [sighs] Okay, something that looks nice. You know, anything but roses, okay? Sam: I hate this job. Riggan: I can't... [Call drops]

Birdman (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Jake: Thanks for coming out. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Were expecting some great pieces. [sighs] Guys in publicity now want a Times feature, which is the worst idea right now. [takes a deep breath, then looks up at Riggan] What are you doing? Riggan: [takes down a Birdman poster] I don't want to look at this anymore. Jake: That was a present from the crew. Don't fuck with those guys. They're union. Riggan: I don't care. Jake: How'd it go? Riggan: Good. Jake: They talk about Ralph at all? He did it, you know. The motherfucker did it. Threatened to sue us. Didn't even wait to get out of the hospital. Riggan: What'd you say? Jake: What did I say? Riggan: [unable to find a good spot for the poster] Shit. Goddamn it. Where am I gonna put this? Jake: I said, "You motherfucker, are you threatening me?" I swear to God, I so much as get a letter from a lawyer, then the press is gonna get the pictures off your computer. That's what I said. Riggan: What pictures? Jake: He has a thing for n

Birdman (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Mike: Intimidating, isn't it? You have any idea the people who have walked on these boards...before you? Geraldine Page, Helen Hayes, Jason Robards, Marlon Brando, and now...Riggan Thomson. Riggan: [chuckling] Yeah. Hey, thanks for coming in on such short notice, Mike. I really appreciate it. Mike: This is what I do. You wrote this adaptation? Riggan: I did, yeah. Mike: And you're directing and starring in your adaptation? Riggan: I am, yeah. Mike: That's ambitious. Riggan: Well, thanks. Mike: Well, it's a good theater. I can't speak for your play, but let's, uh, let's do a little bit of it, yeah? Riggan: Oh, I didn't expect you to come in and, you know, just jump right in. Mike: It's first preview tomorrow night, man. Let's get to work. Riggan: Okay, well, you know, look...you know, feel free to take the script up until you feel comfortable. Mike: No, no, no, no, let's just...let's just do some of it. Riggan: All right. Okay, uh, hey, take a look at page 20. Mike: I'm good. I don't ne

Birdman (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Lesley: Why don't I have any self-respect? Laura: You're an actress.

Birdman (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Mike: Does she speak? Sam: She does. Yeah, she can sit, stay, and roll over if you have any treats.

Birdman (film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Riggan: Listen to me. I'm trying to do something important. Sam: This is not important. Riggan: It's important to me, alright? Maybe not to you, or your cynical friends whose only ambition is to go viral. But to me, to me...this is...God. This is my career. This is my chance to do some work that actually means something. Sam: Means something to who? You had a career before the third comic book movie, before people began to forget who was inside the bird costume. You're doing a play based on a book that was written 60 years ago, for a thousand rich old white people whose only real concern is gonna be where they go to have their cake and coffee when it's over. And let's face it, Dad, you're not doing this for the sake of art. You're doing this because you wanna feel relevant again. Well, guess what? There's an entire world out there where people fight to be relevant every single day, and you act like it doesn't exist! Things are happening in a place that you ignore, a place that, by the

Birdman (film), CC BY-SA 4.0