Quotes

Dialogue

Carole: Help, I'm a prisoner! I can't get out! Van Hippy: We all prisoners, chickee-baby. We all locked in. Huh, a couple of weirdos, Guenivere.

Dialogue

Jim Douglas: Why is it the only food we have in this house is parrot food? I mean, we don't *have* a parrot. Tennessee Steinmetz: Eat that! That's good! That's pressed kelp. That aerates your liver.

Dialogue

Jim Douglas: Where's the beast? You didn't cut up the Edsel! Tennessee Steinmetz: Came over me all of a sudden. Seemed like the only decent thing to do. Believe me, Jim, it'll be happier up there.

Dialogue

Mr. Thorndyke: I take it that the question of price does not concern a gentleman like yourself. Jim Douglas: I wouldn't haggle, if that's what you mean. Mr. Thorndyke: And what might your desired price range be, sir? Jim Douglas: Oh, about $75. Mr. Thorndyke: [laughs, thinking this is a joke] $75. Jim Douglas: I could do $80 in a pinch. What do you have in the way of cheap, honest transportation? Mr. Thorndyke: [visibly annoyed] "Cheap honest transportation." [snatches back the glass of sherry] I will bid you good day, sir. Jim Douglas: Good day. [a Volkswagen Beetle rolls through the mechanic's shop doors and gently bumps him] Hey! Well, now, where did this come from? Mr. Thorndyke: Havershaw! Havershaw: Mr. Thorndyke, yes, sir? Mr. Thorndyke: What is this thing doing in my showroom, may I ask? Havershaw: I believe Miss Bennett may know something about this. Mr. Thorndyke: Miss Bennett? Carole: Yes, you remember when Mrs. van Lewett purchased a new Bentley? Well, she also asked us to

Dialogue

Jim Douglas: What do you know? Engine stalled. Carole: [tries to get out] How about that? Door's stuck. That's how it is with cars sometimes. I guess we'll have to wait and see what happens next. Jim Douglas: Well, as someone very wisely once said, "That's how it is with cars sometimes." Carole: I just said that. Jim Douglas: Oh.

Dialogue

Carole: I wonder if your reputation is altogether true. Jim Douglas: What's my reputation? Carole: Well, I've heard that Jim Douglas is only interested in fast cars and easy money. Jim Douglas: Not true. Carole: Oh. Jim Douglas: Mm-hmm. You know something else? Carole: What? Jim Douglas: When the light hits you just right, you're as beautiful as General Grant on a $50 bill.

Dialogue

Mr. Thorndyke: Good evening. Tennessee Steinmetz: Sorry, the other rats are out for the evening!

Dialogue

Mr. Thorndyke: What part of Ireland did you say your mother came from? Tennessee Steinmetz: Coney, Island.

Dialogue

Mr. Thorndyke: Have you gone mad? Jim Douglas: Okay, what's the joke? Mr. Thorndyke: What do you mean? Jim Douglas: I don't know how you rigged it, but I'm sure that car is a real cut-up when a convention comes to town. Mr. Thorndyke: [baffled] What in the name of...? Jim Douglas: If I'd wanted a trick car, I would have bought one at a joke shop. Mr. Thorndyke: Allow me to say that I haven't the slightest idea what you're talking about. You come billowing up in that beastly little car, and assault my personal Rolls-Royce! Jim Douglas: ...I brought it back! I want my money, I want the papers I signed, and then I'll get outta here, and you two clowns can, can have your little laugh. Carole: Mr. Douglas, if there is anything wrong with the car, would you be good enough to tell me what it is? Jim Douglas: Well, there's nothing essentially wrong with the car. It's just that it wants to go one way and I'd like to go the other- Mr. Thorndyke: Well, whatever it is, none of it is covered in our

Dialogue

Mr. Thorndyke: Havershaw, I am not a cowardly man, but I get the feeling that thing is out to get me. Havershaw: Now, now, sir, none of that. We're not losing our nerve, are we? Mr. Thorndyke: BLAST you, Havershaw! How dare you patronize me! I am not losing my nerve! Havershaw: No, sir. No, sir, of course not.