E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial

Gertie: What are you going as for Halloween? Elliot: I'm not going to stupid Halloween. Michael: Why don't you go as a goblin? Elliot: Shut up. Mary: It's not that we don't believe you, honey. Elliot: Well, it was real, I swear! Mary: [changing the subject] What are you going as, Gert? Gertie: [with steak in mouth] I'm going as a cowgirl. Elliot: So, what else is new? Michael: Maybe it was an iguana. Elliot: It was no iguana. Michael: Maybe, uh...uh - You know how they say there are, uh, alligators in the sewers? Gertie: Alligators in the sewers. Mary: All we're trying to say is maybe you just probably imagined it. It happens. Elliot: I couldn't have imagined it! Michael: Maybe it was a pervert, or a deformed kid, or something. Gertie: A deformed kid. Michael: Maybe, uh, an elf or a leprechaun. Elliot: [stands up angrily] IT WAS NOTHING LIKE THAT, PENIS-BREATH! Mary: [laughs] Elliot! [laughs, but regains composure] Sit down. [clears throat] Elliot: [sitting down] Dad would believe me.

E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial, CC BY-SA 4.0

Michael: [in awe, upon seeing E.T.] Elliot? Elliot: [while looking at the hiding E.T.] I'm keeping him. Gertie: [still got her mouth covered by Michael] What is it? Elliot: He won't hurt you, Gertie. He won't hurt you, Gertie. He's not gonna hurt you. Gertie: [as Michael uncovers her mouth] Is he a boy or a girl? Elliot: He's a boy. Gertie: Was he wearing any clothes? Elliot: No. But, look. You can't tell, not even Mom. Gertie: Why not? Elliot: Because, um, grown-ups can't see him. Only little kids can see him. Gertie: [snapping back] Give me a break. Elliot: [imitating Dracula] Vell, do you know vhat's going to happen if you do tell? [tosses Gertie's stuffed animal to Michael] Do it, Mike. We have to. Gertie: [tugging her doll with Michael] Give it to me! Elliot: [to Gertie] Promise? Gertie: Yes. Elliot: [to Michael] Do you promise?

E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial, CC BY-SA 4.0

Mary: What are you doing, Gertie? Gertie: I'm going to play in Elliot's room. Mary: Okay, don't let them torture you. Gertie: I won't, Mary.

E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial, CC BY-SA 4.0

Michael: [about E.T.] Did you explain school to him? Elliot: How do you explain school to a higher intelligence? Michael: Maybe he's not that smart. Maybe he's a worker bee who only knows how to push buttons. Elliot: He's too smart. Michael: All right. I just hope we don't wake up on Mars or somethin' surrounded by millions of little squashy guys.

E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial, CC BY-SA 4.0

Gertie: Here he is. Mary: [absently] Here's who? Gertie: The man from the moon. [as Mary unknowingly hits E.T. with the refrigerator door] But I think you've killed him already. Mary: Just as soon as I unload this stuff, okay? [inspects a small basket of cherry tomatoes] Medbugs. Gertie: I want you to meet somebody. Mary: Gertie, I've gotta go pick up Elliot. Will you be a good girl until I get back? Gertie: Momma, he can talk! Mary: [thinking she meant Elliot] Of course he can talk. I'll be back in 10 minutes. Stay there.

E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial, CC BY-SA 4.0

Elliot: [upon seeing E.T. in a dress, hat, wig, and jewelry] Oh, God! E.T.: Elliot. Elliot: [still frustrated] What?! E.T.: Elliot! Elliot! Gertie: I taught him how to talk. He can talk now. [Elliot sees electronics and supplies together in the closet] Look what he brought up here all by himself. What's he need this stuff for? Elliot: E.T., can you say that? Can you say 'E.T.'? E.T.? E.T.: E.T. Elliot: [laughs in amazement] Ha! Ha! E.T.: [waddling away] E.T.! E.T.! E.T.! Be good. Gertie: "Be good." I taught him that too. Elliot: You should give him his dignity. This is the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen. E.T.: [gives Elliot a newspaper and points at a comic picture] Phone. Elliott: "Phone"? He said "phone"? He said "phone"?! Gertie: Can't you understand English? He said "phone". E.T.: [points to closet] Home? Elliott: You're right. That's E.T.'s home. E.T.: [scurries over to the window and points his long finger towards it] E.T. home phone. Gertie: E.T. phone home. Elliot: [under

E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial, CC BY-SA 4.0