The King of Comedy

Rita Keane: [to Pupkin] You call me up all junior and senior year. Night after night after night, right? And every time I'm wondering 'when is this guy going to stop talking and ask me out?' Well, now I know the answer. August twelfth, nineteen seventy-six. It only took you ten, eleven years to work up to it. Official: We are met here in these extraordinary circumstances to join this man and this woman in holy wedlock. But, before we begin, let me voice a personal word of thanks to you, Rupert and to you, Rita, for choosing me to perform this prestigious ceremony. Because we are on prime time, I am going to discard my customary remarks in favor of a few personal reflections. When I was principal at Clifton High and these two were students, I had very little faith that Rupert here would amount to very much. But like his teachers and his fellow students, I underestimated this fine young man. Some say that this misjudgment is directly tied to my recent dismissal as head of the Clifton Sch

The King of Comedy (1983 film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Pupkin: What are you going to do with Jerry's autograph? Young girl: I don't know. Maybe I'll sell it. Boyfriend: I'll tell you what she's going to do with it. She's going to pin it on her bulletin board and have an orgasm.

The King of Comedy (1983 film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Pupkin: I'm grateful for this chance to talk to you ... I hope I'm not boring you. Langford: I'll let you know. Pupkin: Really? Fine. I'm Rupert Pupkin, Jerry. I know that the name itself doesn't mean very much to you but it means an awful lot to me, believe me. Maybe you've seen outside your show and wondered who I am. Well, right now, I'm in communications but, by nature, I'm a stand-up comedian. I know what you're thinking -- 'Oh no. Not another one.' And I wouldn't take up even one minute of your time if I wasn't absolutely convinced of my talent. I'm really good, Jerry, believe me, I'm dynamite. Now you're probably wondering if I'm so good why haven't you caught my act somewhere, right? Langford: Well ... Pupkin: Well, up to now, I've been biding my time developing my act slowly and carefully so that when my big break finally comes, I'm ready -- like you were that night Paar got sick and you sat in for him. I was there that night, in the theater. That was the most important night

The King of Comedy (1983 film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Pupkin: I've been giving a lot of thought to your situation, Jerry, ever since I saw you starting to lose ground in the ratings. And I think I know what the problem is. Too many of the same faces. Langford: Yeah? Pupkin: Sure, people are getting tired of these people who live off game shows and talk shows and can't really do anything. They've seen 'em and heard 'em till they can't stand it anymore. Langford: You know, maybe you're right, Rube. Pupkin: I'm sure I am. When a show runs out of surprises, it loses its audience.

The King of Comedy (1983 film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Rita: Jesus Christ, Rupert Pupkin! Pupkin: The two of us are often confused. He's the one with the famous father.

The King of Comedy (1983 film), CC BY-SA 4.0

Rita: So all this time you've been thinking about me, huh? Pupkin: That's right, Rita. Rita: What kinds of things were you thinking? Rita: Oh, ho! Those kinds of things! Shame on you, Rupert. Pupkin: Rita, I assure you there was ... Rita: Rupert Pupkin is an unclean person! Pupkin: Come on, Rita. People will hear. Rita: [whispering] Rupert Pupkin is an unclean person. Oh, come on, Rupert. Relax. Have a little fun.

The King of Comedy (1983 film), CC BY-SA 4.0