Quotes

Dialogue

Steve-O: I just googled the world's hardest punch ever recorded. Francis' punch is the equivalent of being hit by a Ford Escort at top speed. Francis Ngannou: Wait, you don't need to read that now.

Dialogue

Johnny Knoxville: How you doing over there Rachel? Rachel Wolfson: Wee Man is going to space

Dialogue

Jules Sylvester: This is a Texas rat snake. Johnny Knoxville: Are they venomous? Jules Sylvester: [Pause] Eh.

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Jeff Tremaine: Zackass! He's a real wild crazy guy! He's the gnarly superstar! Zackass! Chris Pontius: There ain't a thing he wouldn't do! He'd jump in cacti for you!

Dialogue

Compston Wilson: Imma fuck you up man you suppose to be having my back. Davon Wilson: I got you a job!

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Johnny Knoxville: He's about to have 5 gallons of pig cum dumped on him. Tyler the Creator: Damn, that sounds like me in London.

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Ehren McGhehey: Look at Dave's face! Dave England: Fuck off! Fuck all the way off!

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Johnny Knoxville: I was supposed to pour the milk in the hat and then put the hat back on and no milk would come out. Did milk come out? Lance Bangs: There was some milk on the ground. Johnny Knoxville: Oh... oh, shit.

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Maybe next year.

Dialogue

Johnny Knoxville: How is Raab not in this? Chris Raab: I'm the smart one I already know what's gonna happen.

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Ehren McGhehey: There's a door, I just opened it, I swear to god! Dave England: Oh wow, how conveniant.

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Johnny Knoxville: Does it smell like pig semen? Does it smell? Chris Pontius: Why are you looking at me like that?

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Zach Holmes: We're not doing that again. Sean McInerney: This guy's one badass dude right here. Zach Holmes: I love you, dude. Sean McInerney: That was sick. You showed *us* how to surf!

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Rachel Wolfson: My lip is so fucked up you guys. I feel fucked up. Eric André: But she looks great.

Dialogue

Colson "Machine Gun Kelly" Baker: How did you beat me? Steve-O: I don't know dude. I don't know man. I was coming off my pedals, it was not my strongest performance, you were just really bad.

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Ehren McGhehey: Fuck this cup sucked. This is the worst cup of them all. Steve-O: I'm starting to think those cups don't work dude.

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Jeff Tremaine: Just say "this is Body Surfing" we don't need the intro. Davon Wilson: I wanna say my name! This is Zach, I'm Jasper and this is Body Surfing mothafucka!

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Aaron Homoki: Where were you? Chris Pontius: I was... I just.

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Johnny Knoxville: Poopies, that was really uncool. Sean McInerney: Did you feel the vibration?

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Ehren McGhehey: You just got cummed on, dude! Johnny Knoxville: That's pig cum! Dave England: What is it? Johnny Knoxville: Pig cum! Dave England: That's pig cum? Ehren McGhehey: That's pig cum! Johnny Knoxville: 5 gallons! Dave England: I'm a vegetarian!

Dialogue

Preston Lacy: I should not have eaten Indian and Cuban food in the same day. Lance Bangs: [Repeatedly] No..! [Regurgitates]

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Zach Holmes: I'm gonna pass out! I'm passing out! Steve-O: Zach's passing out!

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Jason 'Wee Man' Acuña: We got the Whambulance coming for ya if you don't get to this next bit. Ehren McGhehey: I will tell you right now if the jokes continue I will stand up and walk away. Johnny Knoxville: He's gonna take his nuts and go home.

Dialogue

Johnny Knoxville: Wow! He's talking smack! Preston Lacy: Some mime shit talkin' over there.

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Rob Dyrdek: How many times to we get to play? Johnny Knoxville: Oh this is probably a oner. Rob Dyrdek: [Laughs] Shit!

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Chris Pontius: You're wearing it backwards or upside down. Ehren McGhehey: I don't need physics from you guys right now!

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Johnny Knoxville: I don't know what's worse. The wedgie or these junkyard mattresses you gotta land on. Jason "Wee Man" Acuña: Yeah. Look at that pee stained one right there. Bam Margera: Ew dude.

Dialogue

Chris Pontius: Poopies doesn't have the biggest penis in the world, not the second biggest either. Sean McInerney: I think I have the smallest one out of the whole group. That was what I was most nervous about, showing it to the whole world. But that's what we're here for.

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Eric Manaka: I don't think he's very happy. Spike Jonze: Have you ever been around bulls before? Eric Manaka: I've never been around a bull in my whole entire life, not a real one. Ah shit! Ah shit!

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Dave England: Was that the first time you got cummed on? Sean McInerney: Yeah, for sure. No, the second.

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Jeff Tremaine: Did they put that goofy ass beard on in make-up? Lionel Boyce: You a hater. How you just gonna come over and say some fuck shit about my nice ass beard.