Quotes

Good News About Hell [1.01]

You know, my mother was an atheist. She used to say that there was good news and bad news about hell. The good news is hell is just the product of a morbid human imagination. The bad news is whatever humans can imagine, they can usually create.

Good News About Hell [1.01]

[As Mrs. Selvig] You know, my mother was a Catholic. She used to say it takes the saints eight hours to bless a sleeping child. I hope you aren't rushing the saints.

Good News About Hell [1.01]

[reading calmly into camera] My name is Helly R. I'm making this video roughly two hours before it will be shown .. to me. I have, of my own free accord, elected to undergo the procedure colloquially known as Severance. I give consent for my perceptual chronologies to be surgically split, separating my memories between my work life and my personal life. I acknowledge that, henceforth, my access to my memories will be spatially dictated. I will be unable to access outside recollections whilst on Lumon's severed basement floor, nor retain work memories upon my ascent. I am aware that this alteration is comprehensive and irreversible.

The You You Are [1.04]

If you want a hug, go to hell and find your mother.

The You You Are [1.04]

I could not, with a razor to my throat, be less interested in being your family.

The You You Are [1.04]

[to Milchick] Well, boss. I guess this is the part where I should tell you to go to hell. Except you're already here.

The You You Are [1.04]

[on video] Helly, I watched your video asking that I resign. I also received and responded to your previous request. I assumed that would resolve the issue, but now Ms. Cobel says you threatened to cut off your fingers? I understand that you're unhappy with a life that you've been given. But you know what? Eventually, we all have to accept reality. So, here it is. I am a person. You are not. I make the decisions. You do not. And if you ever do anything to my fingers, know that I will keep you alive long enough to horrible regret that. Your resignation request is denied. Turn it off.

The You You Are [1.04]

Burt G.: [Quoting Kier] "Let not weakness live in your veins, cherished workers, drown it inside you." Irving B.: [Continues Kier quote] "Rise up from your deathbed and sally forth, more perfect for the struggle." Burt G.: Exactly.

The Grim Barbarity of Optics and Design [1.05]

[in his book] Bullies are nothing but Bull and Lies.

The Grim Barbarity of Optics and Design [1.05]

Helly R.: I told her I wanted out and she told me I wasn't a person. My own self told me that. Mark S.: Yeah, and, and that's horrible, but don't focus on her; what do you want, in here? Helly R.: What I want is for her to wake up while the life drains out of her and to know it was me who did it.

The Grim Barbarity of Optics and Design [1.05]

[in his book] Remember, they can’t crucify you if your hand is in a fist.

The Grim Barbarity of Optics and Design [1.05]

The surest way to tame a prisoner is to let him believe he's free.

Hide and Seek [1.06]

It’s important because it actually is or because you’re saying it is?

Defiant Jazz [1.07]

Let's burn this place to the ground.

Defiant Jazz [1.07]

My wife was extraordinary. My wife was allergic to nutmeg. And when she sneezed, she always sneezed twice. My wife liked other people's dogs. My wife thought cardigans looked ridiculous. I loved all these things about her... equally.

What's for Dinner? [1.08]

Your so-called boss may own the clock that taunts you from the wall, but, my friends, the hour is yours.

The We We Are [1.09]

It's said that as a child, Wolfgang Mozart killed another boy by slamming his head in a piano. Don't worry. My research for this book has proven the claim untrue. As your heart rate settles, though, consider the power an author, which we'll refer to as Me, can hold over a reader, heretofore called You. But what, indeed, is You? How can You mean different things to millions of readers around a vast earth? And, perhaps most importantly, who are You?

The We We Are [1.09]

My name is Helena, and I'm an Eagan. So one of the things that you learn growing up as an Eagan, is that the workers are our family. And I remember being confused about that as a kid, because I thought that meant I had a few hundred thousand literal brothers and sisters scattered around the world. [laughs] Oh, my God. But as I grew older, I learned that it's about shared ideals. My dad used to make me recite the nine core principles before bed every night, which I can't say I always did happily. Sorry, dad. But those are now the values that I share with everyone who works at Lumon, and that's what makes them my family. And I would never ask them to do anything that I'm not willing or excited to do myself. Look, my dad would love for me to sit here and say that I'm taking this job out of loyalty, and that it was the spirit of pure Eagan calling me to service. But I took a severed job because it sounds freaking awesome. So, no, I don't think severance divides us. I think it brings us tog

The We We Are [1.09]

Devon Scout-Hale: Mark has b-- I mean, out here, you have been trying to figure out what Lumon does. What you do. Mark Scout: Okay. I just... I just want to know why. Why he put me in there. Devon Scout-Hale: He lost his wife. You lost your wife. A little before you started at Lumon. Mark Scout: Gemma. Devon Scout-Hale: It was a car accident, and, at first, you tried to keep teaching. Mark Scout: I was a teacher? Devon Scout-Hale: A professor. Of history. You tried to go back to teaching three weeks after she died, and it was a disaster. She was just still in your veins, you know? Making everything hurt. Which I why I guess you thought the severed job would-- He hoped you'd be spared from the pain. Mark Scout: It's a nice name. Gemma. Devon Scout-Hale: Yeah. We were all really close. It was great. She was wonderful. She made you wonderful.

The We We Are [1.09]

Jame Eagan: Helena. You look so nice. Like a film. Helly R: Thank you. Jame Eagan: Are you... Are you still in pain? Helly R: I'm not. Not anymore. Jame Eagan: I cried in my bed when they told me what she tried to do to you. What that innie tried to do. I-- Thank you for going through with this. The Grandfather would cherish what you've done. And one day you will sit with me at my revolving. Are you feeling well? Helly R: Yeah. I think, I think the drink just hit me a little bit. Jame Eagan: You'll be all right for the speech? Helly R: For my speech. Yeah, of course. Jame Eagan: Do you remember when I brought home the first chip to show you? The prototype. It had the blue and green lights back then. Helly R: Yeah. Jame Eagan: I remember when you said to me, 'It's so pretty, daddy. Everybody in the whole world should get one.' They will. Because of you. They'll all be Kier's children.

The We We Are [1.09]

But I'm here tonight to tell you that we are on the verge of a revolution. A kind and empathetic revolution that puts the human being at the center of industry. And yes, it's a business revolution too. We need no longer see those ideas as mutually exclusive, because the truth is we can have all of it. Increased productivity, improvements in morale... a happier workplace. A happier world. It's a vision that was first dreamed up by a humble military doctor you may know named Kier Eagan. A man who saw humans in agony and decided we could do better. He may never have seen a Severance chip in his lifetime, but it represents his elegant and gentle philosophy made manifest.

The We We Are [1.09]

My name is Helly R. I'm an innie. And everything they told you about Severance is a lie! [crowd laughs] No, no, no. Listen, we're not happy. We're miserable. They torture us down there! We're prisoners!

The We We Are [1.09]

Forgive me for the harm I've caused this world. None may atone for my actions... but me. And only in me shall their stain live on. All I can be is sorry. And that is all I am.

Hello, Ms. Cobel [2.01]

[in a video] Under my literal nose unfolded a human drama of danger and intrigue, inspiration and love.

Hello, Ms. Cobel [2.01]

Irving B.: I want it to be over. Dylan G.: Okay. So then after you find the black hallway or... Irving B.: I want the pain to be over. If he's gone and I'm gone... Dylan G.: Stop saying that. Irving B.: ...then somehow, we'll be together. Dylan G.: He wouldn't want that. Irving B.: How do you know? Dylan G.: Because I don't want that. Because I would be sad, and I would be less productive, and I'm really good at what I do here, whatever it is. And you're part of what makes me good at it. So please, do not go. Irving B.: Dylan. I'm your favorite perk. Dylan G.: Don't bring them into this.

Hello, Ms. Cobel [2.01]

Seth Milchick: Take a look. These are blueprints for a new renovation, of which I chose not to inform your colleagues. It's called the Outie Family Visitation Suite. Dylan G.: Are you saying I could see my family here? Seth Milchick: If you take the name of the room at face value, I'd say yes. Dylan G.: Holy fuck. Seth Milchick: The holiest.

Hello, Ms. Cobel [2.01]

Mark Wilkins: Why are you a child? Miss Huang: Because of when I was born.

Goodbye, Mrs. Selvig [2.02]

Harmony Cobel: You don't value me. You fear me. Helena Eagan: We fear no one.

Who Is Alive? [2.03]

But surely beer and juleps cannot fill the void left by love. Indeed only wine can achieve this, but it is famously costly, which is why sadness is among the most recurrent issues facing the poor.

Woe's Hollow [2.04]

[to Helena] Helly was never cruel.

Woe's Hollow [2.04]

Marshmallows are for team players, Dylan. They don't just hand them out.

Woe's Hollow [2.04]

She's a fucking mole!

Attila [2.06]

Did everyone sever their balls in the elevator this morning?

Attila [2.06]

Mark S.: Hey, do you want me to, like, describe what happened? Like, I feel like you have every right to know. Helly R.: No, no, no. I don't want her memory. Mark S.: Okay. Helly R.: I want my own.

Attila [2.06]

Burt Goodman: Well, as a matter of fact, I was guided to Lumon's door by Jesus. Irving Bailiff: Jesus Christ? Burt Goodman: That's the one!

The After Hours [2.09]

Mr. Drummond: So this is "tightening the leash"? Our most vital refiner missing in the wind on what was to be Lumon's finest day. This is your fault. Seth Milchick: I have followed protocol, Mr. Drummond, but I thank you for your remonstration. Mr. Drummond: A needlessly complex word for a simple idea. Apologize for the word. Seth Milchick: Sir... Mr. Drummond: Apologize for the word. Seth Milchick: I apologize. Mr. Drummond: Shorter. Seth Milchick: I'm sorry. Mr. Drummond: Again. Seth Milchick: Mr. Drummond... Mr. Drummond: Again. Seth Milchick: [pause] Devour feculence. It means "eat shit", Mr. Drummond. Mr. Drummond: What did you just say to me? Seth Milchick: I am manager of the Severed floor, which means two things: First, I am owed a measure of respect - even by my superiors. Second, and more obvious, that said floor comprises the whole of my jurisdiction. To put that monosyllabically: It's not my fault what Mark Scout does when he is not at work - it's yours.

Cold Harbor [2.10]

Kier Eagan: Mark S., in completing your 25th Macrodata file, you have drawn my grand agendum nearer to fulfilment, thus making you one of the most important people in history. Revel now in the fruit of your labors, and hail your earthbound steward, your very own... floor manager! Seth Milchick: [enters the spotlight] Thank you, Kier. And may I say, you're looking very handsome, sir. Kier Eagan: Thank you. I'd say the same of you, if not for my favorite core principle. Seth Milchick: Probity? Kier Eagan: No. Vision. Seth Milchick: Well, it's truly special to host a man so illustrious, so sapient, so magnanimous. Kier Eagan: My, you're verbose. Good thing you didn't write the first appendix. It would've burst. Seth Milchick: It's an honor to receive your barbs, Mr. Eagen. The legacy you've left behind is truly and irrefutably larger than life. Kier Eagan: You mean my company? Seth Milchick: No. I mean this wax statue that's five inches taller than you actually were. Kier Eagan: Thank you

Cold Harbor [2.10]

Fuck you, Mr. Milchick.

Cold Harbor [2.10]

Seth Milchick: Choreography and Merriment, return to your department now! Bukayo: [blows whistle] Fall back to C&M. Our performance has been compromised. Helly R: No, no, no, no. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait. This desk used to have four seats. Our friend Irving is gone, and they want our whole department gone. [pointing at Milchick] If he gets out, we're dead. They're gonna turn us off like fucking machines! You've seen them do it. I know you've lost friends too. And you could be next. You could be next. Helly R: They give us half a life and think we won't fight for it. Right, Milchick? [turning back to the C&M members] Please, help us. Please. Help us!